Shocking and out of control Uranus squares snarly Pluto. It tips our small crafts, sprays us with foam and generally upends our clean little world. Prepare to get very wet and dirty, kiddos.
ARIES ( MARCH 21 - APRIL 20 ) Your current holiday plans may undergo a surprising change in itinerary. Gay Rams begin to feel penned in but don't fight fate. Go with the flow and see where the stream carries and eventually deposits you... like debris. Ahem.
TAURUS ( APRIL 21 - MAY 21 ) There are times when your lusty, thrusty adventures feel more dusty and musty. Is it your technique or the interference of friends that cramps your style? Content yourself with a buttered roll and a hot toddy rather than a buttered roll with a hot teddy.
GEMINI ( MAY 22 - JUNE 21 ) Pink Twins feel caught up in the corporate bureaucracy and try to plot their way out. Wait. Pluto squares Uranus and places some potholes in your professional path. Tread carefully and maneuver politically. Overthrow the forces next week.
CANCER ( JUNE 22 - JULY 23 ) Gay Crabs are suddenly back at square one staring at a confusing pile of possibilities. But don't look at this as a setback, compadre. Look at it as a fresh start and a way to avoid past mistakes. Have you been paying attention... ?
LEO ( JULY 24 - AUG. 23 ) You are in love with love. But suddenly your joi de vivre is dealt a jolt and it sends you back to the harsh lights of reality. Yeah, reality bites, proud Lion. But so does waking up to a troll the morning after.
VIRGO ( AUG. 24 - SEPT. 23 ) If you have taken relationships for granted be prepared to be surprised, queer Virgin. If you have felt some uncertainty and a lack of place, it is a time of reassessment. Good. Sometimes things need to be shaken rather than stirred. Cocktails anyone... ?
LIBRA ( SEPT. 24 - OCT. 23 ) Your communications pack a surprising punch that careens things out of control especially at work. There is plenty of time to exact revenge. But for now, blend into the background and plot your corporate takeover from homebase.
SCORPIO ( OCT. 24 - NOV. 22 ) Pluto squares Uranus and proud Scorps are no longer content to quietly count their cash. It needs to see the bright lights and city streets. And why not? We are only visitors on this earth and life is simply too darn short. Hey, whatever spikes your punch.
SAGITTARIUS ( NOV. 23 - DEC. 22 ) Having a good sense of humor ( and irony ) carries you through a stressful and difficult situation. Life has its ups, downs and even sideways. Remember gay Archer: Laugh and the world laughs with you. Weep and you make it to the gossip pages.
CAPRICORN ( DEC. 23 - JAN. 20 ) You feel on a gut level and no one can change your mind. But before you go heads over tails on someone or something untested and risky, know that Pluto square Uranus creates passing fancies and chimeras. Keep a grip on your innate practicality, pink Cap.
AQUARIUS ( JAN. 21 - FEB. 19 ) How crass can Aqueerians be? They are in a crass class by themselves. All eyes are upon you and you play it up to the hilt. Friends are hard-pressed to back you up should you overstep your boundaries. Maybe it's because of all of that hard pressing?
PISCES ( FEB. 20 - MARCH 20 ) Those Guppies with a lust for power think that this is a good time to make a dramatic power grab. But don't be surprised if you are ultimately hoisted on your own petards. My advice: Wear clean petards just in case.
c ) 2006 THE STARRY EYE, LLC., All Rights Reserved. For Entertainment Purposes Only. Who is your favorite Virgo? Take the poll at www.thestarryeye.typepad.com/queer. Lichtenstein's 'HerScopes; A Guide To Astrology For Lesbians' is an international sensation. Buy it and feel the vibration.