TAKE THE TEST
dna.imagini.net/friends
The folks over at imagini.net have dreamed up this little personality test. You answer questions like 'What is art?' and 'What is a love?' by clicking on pictures. You work your way through all these and at the end it gives you an assessment of your personality. Supposedly I'm an 'easy rider' who 'takes life as it comes.' If by that they mean 'you are a doormat that doesn't make waves and suffers whatever indignities the world throws at you by bitching about it to people who have no control over the situation whatsoever,' then they are amazingly spot-on.
COMING SOON TO A TRAILER PARK NEAR YOU
www.fishnflush.com/index.html
When I first heard of FishNFlush, the toilet tank aquariuam, I have to admit that I thought it would be a nuisance having to restock the tank with fish after each flush. Of course, it turns out that the tank is cleverly designed so that you don't send your fish to the sewer. Of course, that doesn't change the fact that a polite description of it is 'tacky,' a fact that is only underscored by the fact that the damn thing lights up. It is truly one of the three or four most hideous things I've ever seen. It makes me very sad I rent. I'd love to have one with a little Tidy Bowl man floating on top.
THE PRICE OF SALVATION
www.faithbrokers.com
FaithBrokers offers redemption and forgiveness at a rate well below the cost of televangelists. Their services are '100% free.' How do they do it? My guess is volume. In any case, you can go online and offer forgiveness to anyone that has trangressed against you. When I was checking the site out Principal Rich Leprine was being forgiven by the 'John Jay High community for being such an asshole in 'The Vagina Monologue' incident.' You gotta love it when you can offer forgiveness and a beating simultaneously.
IS MY FREUDIAN SLIP SHOWING?
www.ironicsans.com/state22.html
It's simple enough. You have ten minutes. Can you name all 50 states? I got 48. I missed Nebraska and Wisconsin. I'd have gotten Nebraska too if hadn't taken me so damn long to figure out how to spell 'Massachusetts.' Wisconsin? Well I probably wouldn't have gotten them. I tend to try and forget about Wisconsin as much as possible. I have issues with a place that allows a rip-off like the 'Mars Cheese Castle' to operate. I mean what a sham: it ain't a castle; it ain't made of cheese; and it sure as hell ain't on Mars— though given the locals, I guess I can forgive that mistake.