"Happy Birthday to @jessetyler the object of my desire. This love affair has gone on for what seems like an eternity...I love this man more than pussy."—Lea DeLaria posts a very disturbing Instagram birthday greeting to Jesse Tyler Ferguson.
"Never cook bacon in the nude." I can't tell you how many times I've heard that sage bit of advice. Here's one you probably haven't heard: "Never eat a bowl of hot tomato bisque in your underwear." Especially if that bisque just came out of the microwave and is still bubbling. Because if it slips off the table, you know what else could bubble? The tender flesh of your inner thigh. And the less mentioned of my unmentionables, the better. Picture a nice, juicy kielbasa … left just a tad too long on the hibachi. It may not be pretty, but it's still delicious.
Since we just celebrated Halloween, a story about Elvira seems in order. When Cassandra Peterson wrote about being in a same-sex relationship in her fantastic new memoir, Cruelly Yours, Elvira, she lost more than 11,000 followers! Even more staggering—she gained more than 60,000 followers. My abacus is in the shop, but I think that means she ended up ahead.
Neil Patrick Harris is not only a gay man in real life—he'll be playing one on television. NPH's latest career move is a Netflix series called Uncoupled. This Darren Star show is about the uncoupling (hence the name) of Harris and his partner of 17 years, played by Tuc Watkins. According to the producers, "Overnight, [Harris' character] has to confront two nightmares—losing what he thought was his soulmate and suddenly finding himself a single gay man in his mid-40s in New York City." Am I the only one who thinks that doesn't sound so bad? Also cast are Brooks Ashmanskas, Marcia Gay Harden and Tisha Campbell. Eight episodes have been ordered.
I was intrigued by the casting of Julianna Margulies as a lesbian on The Morning Show. But Julianna is ready for the criticism, telling a publication, "I am an actress and I am supposed to embody another character. Whatever their sexuality is doesn't matter to me, the same way watching a gay person play a straight person. Are you telling me that because I'm a mother, I can never play a woman who has never had a child? Or if you've never been married that you can never play a married woman?" I get it—and don't have a problem with it.
This is a topic we tackled on last week's "Billy Masters LIVE." After sharing some details of my aforementioned bisque burn, I was joined by Jonny Beauchamp, Jason Dottley and Mark MacKillop to discuss a wide range of topics—including who should play gay roles. We also talked about the pitfalls of sharing too much of our private lives with the public (and it doesn't get more private than discussing scalding one's privates). Since my guests cover Broadway, television, film and concerts, we had a lively conversation about performing in these trying times, as well as sitting in the audience. I'm traveling this week, so there might not be a new show. But there might be. The only way to know for sure is to check out BillyMasters.com/TV or YouTube.com/BillyMastersTV.
One of the stories we didn't get to on "Billy Masters LIVE" was about Suni Reid. Suni is a trans actor who claims to have been discriminated against by the producers of the musical Hamilton. Reid is a non-binary performer and openly transgender. However, they are a member of the touring company's ensemble, and has occasionally been cast in the roles of George Washington, James Madison and Aaron Burr. Most theaters have a limited backstage area, which means most performers share dressing rooms. And ensemble players are either in a large male or female dressing room. Apparently, Suni was assigned a male dressing room. Reid requested a gender-neutral dressing room—which, naturally, doesn't exist. The producers offered to partition off a section of the ensemble room with a curtain, which they did not find acceptable. When Suni's contract was up, it was not renewed. Reid has filed a complaint with the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission.
By the by, the Mr. Gay World competition has announced that anyone who identifies as male is allowed to compete. But they better not ask for their own dressing room.
We're happy to announce the marriage of Gossip Girl's Jason Gotay and his diminutive spouse, Michael Hartung. Their "elevated backyard ceremony" served pizza and s'mores, and the grooms wore white leather Dr. Martens sneakers. We wish them many years of happiness.
We also want to send congratulations out to Kal Penn on his engagement to his longtime partner … Josh. But we have to ask: Are we the last to know?
When I'm ending on some happy (and surprising) news, it's definitely time to end yet another column. This week, I'm heading back up to Boston. Should any of you be in the area, I'll be seeing my pal Christopher Titus at the Chevalier Theatre in Medford on Nov. 11. You can get tickets at his website, ChristopherTitus.com . As usual, you can find me at BillyMasters.com—the site that's too hot to handle. If you have a question, send it to Billy@BillyMasters.com, and I promise to get back to you before we sign Campbell's as a sponsor! So, until next time, remember: One man's filth is another man's bible.
