In the compelling, intimate movie Our Son (in theaters and available via streaming), Luke Evans and Billy Porter portray a married couple in which one of them decides to file for divorce. However, this is no easy split, as they fight for custody of their 8-year-old son.
Award-winning director Bill Oliver—a gay man with two sons who he co-parents with a lesbian couple—infuses his own experience into the movie but also celebrates the lives of other queer parents. In a recent interview with Windy City Times, Oliver discussed the film's actors and message.
NOTE: This conversation was edited for clarity and length.
Windy City Times: Congratulations on the film. I'm curious about how Luke Evans and Billy Porter became the leads—and how important it was for you to have openly queer actors in those roles?
Bill Oliver: It was very important to me to have openly queer actors as the leads—and, in this movie, all of the gay roles are played by openly gay actors. That was important to me because I wanted the film to feel very real. I knew we wouldn't have that same kind of chemistry [otherwise]. Unfortunately, that narrows the pool when it comes to getting big stars attached to your film, which a lot of people don't understand about the movie business: You need those names to get your movie off the ground.
We were lucky to get those two and it speaks to the progress that has been made on that front. They were able to bring that movie to life—literally, financially and creatively. So I knew their work and thought they'd be great for the parts. I hadn't seen them in anything quite like this, which is exciting for a director, actor and audience.
WCT: Something you said just led me to a question: Why do you think there aren't more out actors?
Oliver: Hmmm… I think it's complicated.
We're still dealing with Hollywood history, which has a very strong history of the closet for actors and directors. I think there have been periods when people felt they could be more out and then "back in"—and the AIDS [crisis] was definitely not helpful on that front because you really had to rush back into the closet if you thought about coming out then.
I'm not an expert, but I think there's just a lot of pressure—and it starts with drama school. I don't think drama teachers, drama coaches and agents get off clean because actors have told me how they've faced pressure to "act more straight" and to conceal signs of homosexuality to get cast in roles. It becomes ingrained in your thinking as an actor. So there are those things and more.
WCT: Regarding the film, I constantly felt conflicted about each of the lead characters. Is the viewer supposed to feel that way?
Oliver: Yes. Making a movie about divorce kind of allowed us to celebrate our flaws and failures, which I think is just as important for queer and marginalized people, who sometimes feel the pressure to be perfect. It was a balance; you don't want to make the characters repellent to an audience, but divorce sometimes brings out the worst in people, so you don't want to shy away from that. Of course, the actors bring so much of themselves to the roles, and that's an added layer of empathy that happens.
So that was all intentional to some degree, but there was also the factor of the audience experiencing it. We've talked with so many audience members who have sided with different characters at different points of the movie so, to some degree, it's subjective.
WCT: I have to mention the actor [Christopher Woodley] who played the son.
Oliver: Yes; the child is the third lead and our casting director, Scotty Anderson, has casted movies with child actors. We probably saw hundreds of kids who auditioned, and Christopher just rose to the top—he had the charm and a realness. I didn't want a child actor who was too polished and precocious. He was professional but he was also able to just be a kid. He was fantastic, thank you.
WCT: And even though she only has one scene in the movie, Phylicia Rashad [as Billy Porter's mother] makes such an impression.
Oliver: She is incredible and we were so lucky to get her. We shot her scene on the very first day of shooting. Sometimes it takes a few days to get into a groove as a filmmaking team, but she was [remarkable]. I was nervous because I had never met her before, but she could not have been more sweet, gracious, charming and professional. There's just a calm about her that's just infectious. Also, she and Billy knew each other and had worked together, so there was already this chemistry. We shot her scene in just a few hours, and they were wonderful.
She's just a great dramatic actress but she's also really funny—maybe from all those years of sitcom work. She ad-libbed some lines that made it into the movie. She is a force.
WCT: This movie says a lot about relationships. What are a couple of the main things it says about them?
Oliver: To me, there are many layers of relationships in this movie. There's the relationship with the central couple; there's the relationship with the friend group, or chosen family; there are parental relationships; [and] there are romantic relationships. They all speak to me about how we take care of each other (especially in difficult times).
Even though it's about a relationship fracturing, the movie is more about love, connection and a celebration of friendship and community and family. Obviously, there's been miscommunication in the marriage, which is the central relationship. While it doesn't address it explicitly, the way we listen to each other is another factor that's in there, too.
WCT: This movie is a little different in that it begins as the relationship is crumbling. I'm curious as to why you decided to take that approach instead of a meet-cute and showing what happens from there.
Oliver: Part of it [involved] where we wanted to get to by the end of the movie, so we wanted to start as late as possible to get to that point. With a break-up movie, it is a challenge to establish the characters so you have a feeling for them and feel their love for each other, because that's important. We slipped in some things to establish a connection, but we needed to move things along—and do so as economically as possible.
WCT: I've seen this movie described as a "gay Kramer vs. Kramer." What do you think of that description?
Oliver: I understand the comparison. There are many divorce films, but I guess that's the one that's the most iconic. I understand it's going to come naturally and we anticipated that. I love that movie and it's not something we tried to copy or emulate. I don't mind the comparison. When you work within a genre, you work both within it and against it, so you have to figure out how to differentiate yourself from movies that came before.
WCT: My last question is something I've asked several people this year: For you, what is it like to be part of the LGBTQ+ community in today's America?
Oliver: Billy and I are kind of close to the same age, so we both came out in the same time period—at the height of the AIDS epidemic, and we lived through that fear. So coming into my queerness has been a journey and a progression, and connecting with my community is an ongoing process that's getting better and better, for me.
At the same time, the world seems to be backsliding, in some ways. However, I think it will pass and I [actually] think it's a sign of progress that there's a flailing about and panic in certain areas. I hope that things will get back on the road to progress.
