"If there's nobody else to do it, then of course I would believe that we should do this."—Sarah Palin tells Entertainment Tonight the circumstances that would push her to run for president in 2012. Please, God, let there be somebody else who wants to do it.
My fans were over the moon about Glee paying homage to The Rocky Horror Show. What you may not know is that we almost got the chance to see John Stamos as Dr. Frank-N-Furter. In the scene where he "auditions" to replace Mike Chang playing Frank-N-Furter, he was supposed to sing "Sweet Transvestite"—which would have made sense. He recorded the song ( with the original lyrics ) and everyone loved it ... until it was nixed by the network. The audition piece was switched to "Hot Patootie," which comes out of nowhere but sets him up to play "Eddie." At least we still have his recording, which you can hear on BillyMasters.com .
The Glee"/"Rocky Horror conjunction brought us loads of skin shots and proved once again that my buddy Matthew Morrison can more than hold his own against those younguns. ( Check out all the guys on our website. ) Alas, it's the younger boys that Playgirl is interested in. The magazine put out a firm offer to both Mark Salling and Chord Overstreet: "We would be very willing to pay for them both—up to $100,000. And it wouldn't have to be fully X-rated, either." OK, you had me, then you lost me. Not X-rated? Even Salling was surprised: "Wow, really? A hundred thousand to keep my clothes on? I'll only do it if I can take my clothes off." Music to my ears.
The swoon-worthy James Marsden will be showing off his fantastic physique on the small screen. Look for Jimmy to drop by Modern Family as, you guessed it, a gorgeous guy in the neighborhood who likes to take off his shirt. What makes it even better is that the neighborhood in question is where gay couple Jesse Tyler Ferguson and Eric Stonestreet live. Marsden's character has a penchant for hot tubs, and the boys take a little time to enjoy the view.
The Scissor Sisters have cancelled nine concerts in Europe due to some undisclosed "funding issues." Since the group has always been more popular abroad than here, this is shocking news indeed. It should be noted that their UK dates were unaffected. Nor did it affect "Elvira's Scissor Sisters Halloween Special," which was an online video promotion they did for their "Night Work" album and for their upcoming gig as Lady Gaga's opening act. You can see the vid on their site, or on BillyMasters.com, of course. It's a hoot.
There are two things that don't go together—Boy George and the female reproductive system. And yet, they made a rare convergence while the Boy was doing a benefit in London for The Meningitis Trust—and if there's one thing I trust, it's meningitis. Some people in the audience expected George to sing some of his classic hits. Instead, he sang a classic—"Blue Moon." A woman in the front row was particularly vocal with her heckling, prompting him to say, "Why don't you shut the fuck up, you rude cunt!" He then threw a glass of something on her. ( Some call it water, while others say vodka. ) I don't know what I love more—the story or the fact that real newspapers in the UK will print the words "fuck" and "cunt." ( I'm curious how many of my stateside papers print this. )
Sticking with anatomy for the time being, Andy Dick had yet another public meltdown. Apparently he was at an outdoor café in our neighborhood ( because he lives a few houses away ) . Let's assume he was drunk—'cause that's usually a safe bet. He harassed a woman walking by and was then chased by a paparazzo. I'm not sure why he harassed the woman. I'm not sure why a paparazzo was following him. Most of all, I'm not sure why Andy's dick was hanging out of his fly. And I'm not sure why I'm gonna post it on BillyMasters.com—but I am.
Just to get the bad taste of Andy's dick out of your mouth, let's swiftly turn to Jared Leto. He posted a hot photo on his Twitter page with a caption that reads, "Real Men Wear Skirts"—because the photo is of the sexy stud shirtless and, well, wearing a skirt. It's on our website, too. Just scan past the photo of Andy.
Our "Ask Billy" question comes from Darrell in San Diego: "I'm a huge comic book fan. What have you heard about Chris Evans as Captain America? He's hot, but is he the Captain?"
Judge for yourself, since Chris appears on the cover of Entertainment Weekly in his Captain America costume. He gives an interview with the mag saying that he was very scared of the role—if it bombed, he'd be a joke; but if it was a hit, he'd be stuck playing the part for five sequels ( per his contract ) . He pushed past his fear and is taking this very seriously, and it shows. Evans is certainly no slouch in the hunkiness department, but he's looking positively Herculean ( which doesn't bode well for the Captain's early scenes, where he's supposed to be scrawny ) . We've been leaked some photos from the set in various forms of undress, and we'll post 'em on BillyMasters.com .
When real men can wear skirts and fishnets, it's definitely time to end yet another column. Halloween is done, the election is over, and we're getting ready for Thanksgiving and Christmas. Either the world is moving too fast, or I have a touch of meningitis! Either way, I'm gonna stay in my seat and work on www.BillyMasters.com—the site that enjoys both vodka and water. If you have a specific question, write me at Billy@BillyMasters.com and I promise to get back to you before I weld Andy Dick's fly shut! Until next time, remember, one man's filth is another man's bible.
