This Week we asked our mafiosos 'Why Does George W. Bush always look like he's about to break into a shit-eatin' grin?
Dave's Top Five
5. If Halliburton is happy, he is happy.
4. Stealing the presidency, and ruining the country is just so gosh-darned fun!
3. To do anything else might actually involve a modicum of brain activity.
2. He's an arrogant bastard who genuinely looks down on those of us who aren't amongst the 'haves and the haves more.'
1. He eats shit.
Andrew's Top Five
5. He's mastered yet another two-syllable word.
4. He preaches abstinence for others when he knows he banged every coed at Yale before he met Laura.
3. He's happy Jennifer Aniston is available.
2. He's happy Brad Pitt is available.
1. He knows he's snowed America -- again.
Peter's Top Five
5. His daughters shared their bong.
4. Daddy gave him a blue pill.
3. Too many beans last night.
2. Laura doesn't wear panties. Ever.
1. He knows he lost. Twice.
Creaoke's Top Five
5. They never found out he was using daddy's term papers in Yale
4. You'd smile too if you could read upside down.
3. When girls get down on their knees for this president, it's for God.
2. He doesn't have to fuck Hillary.
1. Oil and all those young boys and girls to guard it for him.
Kirk's Top Five
5. Sweet memories of fucking the nation.
4. Karl Rove told him he looked pretty.
3. Lobotomies do that.
2. Just got a joke he heard 3 years ago.
1. Ignorance is bliss.
Lisa's Top Five
5. He has a vibrating butt plug in.
4. Daddy promised him if he got through this, he could start drinking again in public.
3. His boxers are too tight.
2. He's got an earpiece in feeding him the theme from Leave it to Beaver.
1. Remembering the fruit loops he had for breakfast.