If you survived Black Friday then there may still be some time for shopping this week on a Pink Wednesday. Here's a tip: Let your fingers do the shopping online where many places offer free shipping.
Nightspots Magazine searched high and low in every crack and cranny to find the perfect gifts for the gay in your life, whether they are naughty or nice.
We went looking for lube in all the wrong places with Joe Lube ( www.JoeLube.com )although it tended to wear off fast. The slippery slopes didn't stay slick and that's a serious problem. Don't try skiing without something to slide on. Ouch!
Maybe we were off on the wrong (ahem) foot but things did get better. Surprisingly at a recent concert where we were jingle-belling to the pop group fun., they were selling a cool T-shirt stating "It's all fun. and gay 'til someone loses their rights." Bargain alert, it's only $15 on their website, store.ournameisfun.com, as opposed to $25 at the merch booth.
While you are supporting the gays' musical merchandise look out for my girls Tegan and Sara ( www.teganandsara.com )and their '80s-inspired organic T-shirt. You are not only helping the environment but also supporting our favorite lesbian twin singers.
You can even decorate your tree with music, including The Flaming Lips' silver trembling fetus ornament ( store.flaminglipsmusic.com ). Nothing screams happy holidays than a little pre-bundle of joy!
Several musicians have released holiday albums, including Everything But the Girl's Tracey Thorn's newest, entitled Tinsel and Lights, where she covers Dolly Parton's "Hard Candy Christmas." Join John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John for This Christmas, full of standards such as "Baby It's Cold Outside." We still haven't recovered from the Glee version last year!
If you still crave more music and are feeling naughty, head over to a live show entitled Spank! The Fifty Shades Parody ( www.theaterinchicago.com ) at the Royal George Main Stage until December 16. This picture of the lead Drew Moerlein gave us blue balls!
Get in shape for the New Year with Hot Nude Yoga featuring Aaron Star, made for gay men in retreats in Hawaii and Costa Rica. You will be twisted up like a pretzel in no time!
Porn is always the gift that keeps on giving and Raging Stallion just released a ten-disc set cleverly titled 10 Pack for a hundred bucks that should keep idle hands busy. Hey, we need more lube!
For the smarty in your party there's the I Can't Even Think Straight: A Gay Pride Bumper Sticker Postcard Book, with offerings such as "Honk If You're a Homo," and "If God Didn't Make Homosexuals, There Wouldn't Be Any." See? We keep the Christ in Christmas!
Last but certainly not least, stuff a stocking with a copy of Nightspots Magazine for the latest in nightlife, pictures, and wacky columns. Happy Holidays, spend and eat until it hurts!