Judging a Porn By Its Cover
Pubert sells his soul to Ghost Writer to help him review his skin flicks. Teaming up, these guys will make sure you don't go down in flames when picking out a hot video!
Ghost: Two discs, good cast!
Pubert: I just interviewed Jake for this issue. Read all about it!
G: The opening credit's vignette covers the whole movie.
Opening scene, entitled 'I,' features Jake Deckard and friend on a bench.
P: Oh, he's opening his fly with his teeth and mashing his crotch afterwards.
G: Das Boot play.
P: He's shaking in his boots. Jake is making him shiver.
G: It's freaking me out.
P: Close-up angle.
G: This cuts to the chase.
P: Sounds like Nine Inch Nails music.
G: What does his tattoo mean?
P: It's tribal.
G: Jake is hot, beefy and sexy.
P: He's riding him backward. I did that the other day but I think he is a little more talented than me.
G: A little?
P: A pinch.
G: Don't feel bad, that is his job.
P: Good cum shot. He just sounded like the Incredible Hulk, Grrr!
Scene 2 is a man in the mirror.
P: He is really sexy.
G: His head is too big.
P: Which one? Why is he whacking his penis like that?
G: Yeah, I don't get that.
P: The music is different in this one. Sounds to me like Lisa Simpson playing her saxophone.
G: I like the music because it disappears in the background.
P: He has great calves.
G: I hope someone joins him.
P: I doubt it. Ouch, he is hitting his dick on the table.
G: 'I'm angry at my penis!' Thwack, thwack.
G: Yay, Dean Monroe.
P: I saw him play a cowboy in a different video. These guys are versatile.
G: He is very talented.
P: I like his baby face. You don't always see that in a leather video.
G: His partner in the scene is a more hardcore leather guy. All natural, unshaven.
P: He is sucking him through the chains.
G: With all those chains, you would think he could tie his feet up with them.
P: You should have been the director. I hope Dean will be at IML.
G: Tiger-striped tattoo.
P: It's different.
G: I wonder if it's to hide scars.
P: I will have to ask him about it someday.
G: This scene is really about the bottom, not the top.
P: I am trying to be professional but Deanie is affecting my weanie!
Scene 4: Francois and Rafael
P: We are going international with this scene.
G: We get one cum shot out of the way pretty quick.
P: Good for them.
G: Now they get to fuck.
P: That scene was just average.
G: Scene 3 was the best!
P: The movie continues on disc two with more from Jake Deckard and his amazing friends.
G: I was disappointed there was not any fisting from Chris Ward. He is well known for that. Butt I like it, haha.
P: I have lots of fisting videos if you are into that. Not my cup of tea, butt we can review them in the future. We need to stop the butt jokes.
G: This is a good video for the IML crowd.
P: You get your money's worth with both discs.
G: Go with your instincts and pick this video up!
Pubert: Thumbs up the butt.
Ghost: Thumbs up the butt.
For your chance to follow your instincts go to www.RagingStallion.com .
Read more about Jake Deckard in this issue and for past reviews go to www.windycitymediagroup.com and type in 'Pubert.'