Native American Idol
Once again the Chief Illiniwek controversy rears its ugly headdress.
Why is it so hard for people to get through their heads that a pimply college boy dressed up like an injun, hopping around and whooping in a fake war dance is offensive to Native Americans? It's also terribly inaccurate. A casino dealer's outfit would be more apropos these days.
In any case, it is no more appropriate as a mascot than any other ethnicity. Can you imagine if
it were the University of Illinois Gangstas and the mascot was a Pimp Daddy? Something tells me Jesse 'Shakedown' Jackson would be on them like ( dare I say it ) white on rice—and for once, I'd agree with him.
Or how about the University of Illinois Mob with a nice Tony Soprano-ish mascot? Fuhgetaboudit. That would never fly. The Italian Anti-Defamation league would have a hit out on the University Chancellor in no time.
They could always try something like the University of Illinois Gypsies. Then they could have a
male and a female mascot. The female could wear lots of clangy, spangly jewelry and dance provacatively whilst the swarthy, mustachioed male slinks through the crowd and picks pockets.
Or how about the Feisty Faeries? Clad in hotpants and a mesh shirt, Bruce the mascot could mince around the court rattling the other team by blowing them kisses and making long, smoldering eye contact while adjusting himself.
And then there's the Suicide Arabs, the Thrifty Jews, the ...
Kissy notes to gspot@graysong.com . Hateful comments to president@whitehouse.gov .