Windy City Media Group Frontpage News

THE VOICE OF CHICAGO'S GAY, LESBIAN, BI, TRANS AND QUEER COMMUNITY SINCE 1985

home search facebook twitter join
Gay News Sponsor Pre-order Book!
Pre-order Book!
Donate

Sponsor
Sponsor

  NIGHTSPOTS

dateland
by Jennifer Parello
2007-10-17

This article shared 2405 times since Wed Oct 17, 2007
facebook twitter google +1 reddit email


This is how it always begins: a draught followed by a storm. For three months my dating landscape was as barren as the surface of the moon. And, then, suddenly, I was in demand.

This situation had happened before, but it always came as a surprise. A happy surprise. One day I was a pariah, repelling every woman within sniffing distance. Then, the next, I was the most popular girl in the room. Women would fight ( in the passive-aggressive way that they do ) to buy me drinks and take me to dinner.

There seemed to be no scientific explanation behind this sudden change in my powers of attraction. I looked the same... give or take a couple of pounds. I acted the same... give or take a couple of mild mood swings. And I always managed to maintain my exquisite table manners through the most devastating cycles of rejection and magnetism.

So, there was no telling when my fortunes would suddenly change. I was unable to manipulate the mysterious flow of my charisma. The best I could do was to wait out the dry spells and welcome periods of allure with unquestioning abandon.

Our story begins at the end of a dateless summer. I was sitting on my back porch, trying not to think of how I had failed to make meaningful eye contact with any drunken women at a bar the night before. And then the phone rang. It was Vanessa, a woman I had met a year before in a tennis league. At the time, I was vaguely attracted to her rangy good looks, her awkward serves ( I'm never charmed by athletic prowess—I like klutzes ) , and her blue-blood ( she had attended one of those rarified liberal arts colleges that offer majors in self-esteem and posture ) . But I hadn't heard from her since the tennis season ended, so I had long ago relegated her to the 'lost cause' heap. Then, out of the blue, she called, and in her distinctly quavering, upper-class Eleanor Roosevelt voice she asked me out to dinner. I accepted.

The next morning at work, I received another call. This one from Lucy, an attorney I had met during a bridge class I taught months before at a lesbian community center. She was a renegade card player, who quickly gave up on the game of bridge, and convinced her group to rebel against me by launching into a merry game of hearts. I admired her willful disobedience and her officious self-assurance. When she demanded my number, I gave it to her with a sigh of submission. But she didn't bother to call until that morning. She commanded me to go to dinner. I accepted.

That evening, the phone rang again. It was Ellen, who I met at an art gallery opening that spring. She was one of the featured artists, specializing in funky cityscapes painted in primary colors. Unfortunately, the sunny color scheme did not reflect her mental state. The first time I visited her apartment, she made a point of gesturing to a counter crowded with prescription bottles. Most were anti-depressants, but there were also bottles of jelly-like vitamins that she had to take in complex combinations several times a day. She called to invite me to an art reception, which she promised to be dreary and uninspired. I accepted

And, so, began my autumn of love.

If you can guess which of these women I end up with at the end of this mystery series, I'll send you a fabulous prize. Register your guess-and find new clues-at www.jenniferparello.com


This article shared 2405 times since Wed Oct 17, 2007
facebook twitter google +1 reddit email





Windy City Media Group does not approve or necessarily agree with the views posted below.
Please do not post letters to the editor here. Please also be civil in your dialogue.
If you need to be mean, just know that the longer you stay on this page, the more you help us.


  ARTICLES YOU MIGHT LIKE

Gay News

dateland 2007-12-19
- Readers, let's get this out in the open: I'm going to admit something that you have all been far too polite to tell me. This mystery series is one of the lamest things I've ever written. ...


Gay News

dateland 2007-11-21
- I first met Ellen at a charity event. It was a typical lesbian affair. The price of admission entitled you to cheap beer and several awkward encounters with women you've been trying to avoid for years. ...


Gay News

dateland 2007-11-07
- I'm not certain why Lucy asked me out because everything I did seemed to irritate her. The only reason I decided to go out with her was because I enjoyed irritating her. On our first date, ...


Gay News

dateland 2007-10-24
- y first date with Vanessa was on one of those damp, wind-whipped autumn days that make you yearn for flannel blankets, long naps, and large dogs that have no respect for your personal boundaries. The date ...


Gay News

BOOK REVIEW: Dateland 2007-10-03
- Author Jennifer Parello. McKenna Publishing Group, 198 pages, $19 Jennifer Parello's debut novel, Dateland, is a fun romp through a world populated entirely by lesbians who talk non-stop in the kind of patter made famous—if not ...


Gay News

dateland 2007-09-26
- I had a few friends over for dinner last night. All of them are in long-term relationships-10, 20, 30 years. So, just to stir up trouble, I asked them all to tell me stories about their dating adventures before they met ...


Gay News

dateland 2007-09-12
- What they don't tell you in lesbian school is that when you get involved in a relationship, you also get in a relationship with your new girlfriend's friends. This can prove to be a strain on ...


Gay News

dateland 2007-08-29
- I was sitting at home yesterday, minding my own business, trying to think happy thoughts, when the phone rang. It was a woman interested in renting a cottage that I own across the street from my ...


Gay News

Dateland 2007-08-01
- There's a song from Gentleman Prefer Blondes that's called 'When Love Goes Wrong.' The first line of the song is: 'When love goes wrong, nothing goes right, this one thing I know.' For years, I believed ...


Gay News

Parello Out with Dateland 2007-08-01
- Jennifer Parello, who writes a column called 'Dateland' for the Windy City Media Group publication Nightspots, has come out with a book of the same name. Dateland is a novel that follows the romantic adventures ...


Gay News

Dateland 2007-07-18
- For years I've been trying to convince my friends to buy matching outfits. I don't want us to dress the same every day. That would be creepy, and, possibly, against the law. All I have asked is that on one evening ...


Gay News

dateland 2007-07-04
- s I was preparing for a move recently, I found a stash of love letters from old girlfriends. As I read them, I came to the conclusion that most love letters are really stupid. That's no reflection on the writing skills ...


Gay News

dateland 2007-06-20
- Although I have no desire to have children myself, I've often fantasized about getting involved with a single mother. Being a stepmother seemed to have all the benefits of motherhood without the hassles. You'd be the ...


Gay News

dateland 2007-05-23
- I recently moved out of the city to a small resort town on Lake Michigan. Why did I do this? To answer this question would raise existential issues that I'm not comfortable addressing without a drink ...


Gay News

dateland 2007-03-28
- Jere's the problem with England's civil partnership ceremonies (CPC) : the government won't allow participants to refer to God, sex, or marriage during the ceremony, but it's perfectly okay to use the word 'ephemeral.' ...


 



Copyright © 2021 Windy City Media Group. All rights reserved.
Reprint by permission only. PDFs for back issues are downloadable from
our online archives. Single copies of back issues in print form are
available for $4 per issue, older than one month for $6 if available,
by check to the mailing address listed below.

Return postage must accompany all manuscripts, drawings, and
photographs submitted if they are to be returned, and no
responsibility may be assumed for unsolicited materials.
All rights to letters, art and photos sent to Nightspots
(Chicago GLBT Nightlife News) and Windy City Times (a Chicago
Gay and Lesbian News and Feature Publication) will be treated
as unconditionally assigned for publication purposes and as such,
subject to editing and comment. The opinions expressed by the
columnists, cartoonists, letter writers, and commentators are
their own and do not necessarily reflect the position of Nightspots
(Chicago GLBT Nightlife News) and Windy City Times (a Chicago Gay,
Lesbian, Bisexual and Transegender News and Feature Publication).

The appearance of a name, image or photo of a person or group in
Nightspots (Chicago GLBT Nightlife News) and Windy City Times
(a Chicago Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender News and Feature
Publication) does not indicate the sexual orientation of such
individuals or groups. While we encourage readers to support the
advertisers who make this newspaper possible, Nightspots (Chicago
GLBT Nightlife News) and Windy City Times (a Chicago Gay, Lesbian
News and Feature Publication) cannot accept responsibility for
any advertising claims or promotions.

 

 

 

TRENDINGBREAKINGPHOTOS







Sponsor
Sponsor


 



Donate


About WCMG      Contact Us      Online Front  Page      Windy City  Times      Nightspots      OUT! Guide     
Identity      BLACKlines      En La Vida      Archives      Advanced Search     
Windy City Queercast      Queercast Archives     
Press  Releases      Join WCMG  Email List      Email Blast      Blogs     
Upcoming Events      Todays Events      Ongoing Events      Bar Guide      Community Groups      In Memoriam      Outguide Categories      Outguide Advertisers      Search Outguide      Travel      Dining Out      Privacy Policy     

Windy City Media Group publishes Windy City Times,
The Bi-Weekly Voice of the Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Trans Community.
5315 N. Clark St. #192, Chicago, IL 60640-2113 • PH (773) 871-7610 • FAX (773) 871-7609.