Miss Tiger's CD release party for I Love Myself was a very sophisticated affair. It was at Bijou Steve's new gallery on the corner of Wells and Schiller; a real nice space that may be used for performance in the future. Miss Tiger shared the occasion with Nathaniel Galka, the photographer who is exhibiting his photographs of the lady herself.
There were a lot of interesting people there, including the guy who created www. jesusdressup.com and a woman from the Indianapolis all-female rock band Drama Queen, but I'm saving her and them for another time.
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I knew there was a patio at Numbers, but somehow I never got out there until those Jackhammer guys took over. I didn't realize it was that big. Nice place for sitting out in the summer.
Those Hotspots guys were there: Woody and what's-her-face— Martin, Minnie, Marsha, oh let's just call her Hot Bitch. They think I'm stalking them, but the opposite is true. They follow me around the city, like two dogs in heat looking for a big bone.
Actually, Woody looked particularly yummy in his leather, although I'm not usually attracted to young beautiful men ( if you believe that, you'd buy Brooklyn Bridge, sweethearts ) . Hot Bitch sat and talked to me for a while about his dear, dear friend— they're almost identical twins—Miss Tee; that foul-mouthed drag queen who performs around town.
He told great stories, like the time Miss Tee put a Roman Candle in her wig and set fire to the ceiling of a bar, the time she had an abortion on stage, and her skill at rolling lesbians across the floor. Now, that's what I call entertainment.
It was also at Jackhammer that I realized how wide the readership of Windy City Times was. A guy came up to me and said, "Oh Sukie, I see your byline everywhere. Last time I saw it was in a bathroom on a Forest Preserve. I looked down on the floor and there was your name looking up at me."
Ughh ... I'll take that as a compliment. It's not many writers that can say they're read by horny, tearoom closet-cases in the suburbs.
I also want to thank the owners and staff at Jackhammer for clearing the top of the bar so I could lie there looking absolutely gorgeous for Hot Bitch to take a picture of me.
The next night I went to the Bear's Honeypot i.e. North End. And there they were again, Woody and Hot Bitch doing Karaoke. Do these people never sleep?
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Sukie's Restaurant of The Week: Although Villa Kula at 4518 N. Lincoln has been in my neighborhood for a couple of years, I didn't get to eat there until two weeks ago; I had thought it was just a tea and dessert cafe.
Then my lover and I saw the menu. Slightly above average prices, but when you consider the cabaret, the beautiful patio, and —most important of all—the excellent cuisine, it really is worth it.
I recommend the Fried Green Tomatoes and Blue Cheese Ravioli. For more info call Villa Kula at 773-728-3114, or visit their website at www.villakula.com
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Photographer Israel Wright invited me to my first Fu' Fu' party down at the Sears Tower. Fu' Fu' is a social group for African-American men, and the parties, two or three a year, are organized by Rodney and Thayer. The group was born five years ago at one of Rodney's birthday parties. "We try and do the parties in places other than dark dungeons where we have to hide," said Rodney, "Some of the places we've been have been a bit wary of us. Three-hundred African-American men, they're leery about fights, but our parties are fine, we've never needed any security. We've set the tone, and though we get people from all walks of life and income brackets, they come forward to the atmosphere we've set. Outside of a Fu' Fu' party they might act totally different. Two years ago we took over Planet Hollywood on a Saturday night."
This party was at the Sears Tower, a perfect setting, with a bar, buffet and a large balcony with a DJ and dancing. The highlight for me was having my picture taken with Frankie Knuckles. My daughter in Britain is the biggest Frankie Knuckles fan.
The next Fu' Fu' is Sunday, July 1, 9 p.m.-3 a.m. at Excalibur, 632 N. Dearborn $15 on the door or www.ticketweb.com; Thayer 773-274-0536 or Rodney 708-798-5805.
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Are you sick and tired of traffic jams, commuting to work, the 9-5 drudge? Are you sick of your job and looking for new career opportunities? ... Well, why not become a high-class Ho. And here's the book to tell you how to do it: The Male Escort's Handbook: Your Guide to Getting Rich the Hard Way by Aaron Lawrence—who is a high-class Ho. The book probes all aspects of prostitution, from advertising online to a horrible list of diseases ( ... I'm never having sex with anyone again ... EVER!! ) ... and useful tips like "Never use a lambskin condom." ... lambskin condoms? I've never heard of such a thing. If any of the readers know anything about lambskin condoms, call me at 773-871-7610 and leave a message on my voicemail. I need a snapshot of me wearing nothing but a lambskin condom ( it's going to be my Christmas card to the Mountain Moving Coffeehouse, but don't tell them, it's a secret ) . According to the book, a downside of being a male escort is: Degradation. "You will sometimes come home from a day on the job feeling used and degraded by your clients ... Other clients are physically and mentally distasteful and will leave you feeling dirty and unclean." Dirty and unclean, isn't that the same thing? Whatever, there's two good reasons to buy this book. 1 ) If you're thinking about becoming a male escort, and 2 ) You can leave it on your coffee table and freak out your parents when they come to visit.
