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  NIGHTSPOTS

MARRS ATTACKS
"Whips, Chains and Other Gay Privileges"
by Homer Marrs
2012-05-23

This article shared 3364 times since Wed May 23, 2012
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You know what's so awesome about being gay? Bondage, dominance and sadomasochism.

Not that you have to be gay to enjoy these things. And I'm not even here to say that I do. But I am here to say that after years of being out, and exposed to this somewhat taboo side of culture, I have concluded that gays are way better off than straights when it comes to sexual liberation. And because of that liberation, psychological freedom; and because of that freedom, a happier existence.

Here's what I mean: For society at large, the BDSM world seems to be acknowledged but kept hidden. It's a thing of shame, perversion and repulsion. You won't hear about it on a sitcom—unless it's a punchline—but you sure as hell will hear about it on CSI, Law & Order or the like, where it'll be presented in the context of a crime perpetrated by someone who looks like he doesn't belong within 100 feet of a school.

Yet sexual fantasies are as old as sex. People get tired of the kind of intercourse they learned about in health class, and want to spice it up with some terra incognita. (If you disagree so far, go out and have five more years of the same sex you're already having, then come back and finish reading.)

Within these fantasies are recurring desires that pay little attention to gender or orientation: to bind or be bound; to control or surrender one's control; to feel or inflict pain; etc.

No big deal! Old as humanity! Boring, even! Let's accept and move forward.

While there might be people who claim never to have had such urges—or swear up and down on the Bible that they never will, so help them God—there are a great number of folks who do, from time to time, get caught up in the idea of acting out these types of fantasies. After years of maybe not even giving it a thought, an itch develops to see what it might be like to be tied to a chair and yelled at in your undies. Sadly, many people—especially straights—feel too "normal" to dare partake in such "deviant" activity.

This is exactly where I'm saying it's healthier to be queer than heterosexual.

In the gay community, the BDSM scene is never far away. Some people live in it, some flirt with it, and others have such staunch aversions to it you'd think they were undercover members of the Westboro Baptist Church. But even these folks know where the action can be found, because they probably have a friend or acquaintance who is all about it.

There are also leather bars, leather groups who host events and march in parades, and contests for people who seek to embody the spirit of this scene (the Westminster of which, IML, we Chicagoans are lucky enough not to have to travel to enjoy each year). It isn't hard to find: once you've entered the big gay mansion of life, you know how to get into the basement … where someone will happily show you the dungeon.

The reason I think this is such a wonderful thing is that I feel terrible problems can arise when people aren't allowed to explore their urges, or believe their urges are wrong, especially such common ones like those discussed above. For gays, there is a lot more encouragement to buy a ticket to the freak show and see how you enjoy yourself. For straights, there seems to be a belief that you can't buy a ticket unless you plan to join the circus.

Repression leads to depression, or worse. So fly your freak flags high, gays, and be glad of the freedom it provides you and the happiness that freedom can provide.


This article shared 3364 times since Wed May 23, 2012
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