A memorial mass took place Aug. 20 for Bryan M. Porcaro of Chicago, who went missing Aug. 5 in California.
A man's body was found Aug. 11 in the open desert near Ludlow, Calif., the Contra Costa Times reported, and it has been confirmed to be Porcaro.
Porcaro, 37, had car trouble on I-40 near Ludlow, according to the Missing Persons of America website. Porcaro was traveling with his 5-month-old black Labrador/poodle puppy, Ruff, when his black Volkswagen Golf broke down. He used an emergency phone on I-40 and drove a few more miles before he abandoned the car.
The body was found at about 1 a.m. a short distance away from where Porcaro's vehicle had broken down, according to San Bernardino County Sheriff's Department.
Porcaro was an account representative with Constellation Energy and was on medical leave while undergoing treatment for liver disease, the website reported. Since last summer, he has lived in Chicago's Lakeview neighborhood, said Todd Davidson, a Chicago real-estate broker.
Davidson and Porcaro met online in 2002 and started dating in 2004, Davidson said.
"His smile was just amazing. His looks just took my breath away when I first met him," said Davidson, 45, who now lives in Edgewater. "There was instantaneous attraction when we first met."
They mostly did indoor activities, such as watching TV together or enjoying home-cooked meals. They also went out for dinner and to movies, but rarely went to gay bars, Davidson said.
"His work was so demanding; he was working 12-hour days, minimum," Davidson said.
The two dated for about three months, Davidson said.
"He had a great personality, was very funny," Davidson said of Porcaro. "He was very subdued, very laid back. A lot of people were friends with him, and everyone says the same thing about him, that he was one of the sweetest guys you'd ever meet."
Porcaro had two cats named Kitty and Other Kitty.
"Bryan was my first boyfriend and anyone who you talk to who knew him will say, he is unforgettable," Davidson said.
"The story that was told to me [about what happened] … there are parts of it that just don't make sense to me. There's got to be something else that happened. They found the keys to the car [still] in the ignition and the dog leash on the side of the car.
"There are so many unanswered questions about this."
Porcaro played volleyball and softball for the predominantly gay Chicago Metropolitan Sports Association (CMSA), including the recently completed Open Division Sunday Softball League. He played on the Strip T's team that finished in second-place in the D2 Division playoffs.
"He was just an all around, thoughtful guy," said Lindsay Frounfelkner, team manager for Porcaro's 2012 softball team. The two have been teammates since 2009.
"Even when he was traveling, when he saw something that reminded him of one of us on the team, he'd post it to our team's Facebook page or just send a text message. He was very thoughtful. It's been bad [the past week or so], surreal. I'm still in shock about it."
Frounfelkner said Porcaro often baked cookies or brownies for the softball team, or a pie.
"He sent me an email at the end of every season, telling me what a good job I did managing the team, how thankful he was, and that he was so excited that he was playing with us," Frounfelkner said.
"He was well-loved. I know everyone [on the team] is pretty heartbroken."
The memorial mass was Aug. 20 at St. Thomas of Villanova Catholic Church in Palatine, starting at 11 a.m., followed by a lunch at the church.
Donations on behalf of Porcaro are asked to be sent to the American Liver Foundation, Frounfelkner said.