"Gay man has too much to drink and legally changes name to Celine Dion."—New Year's Day headline from England. Not only is it embarrassing, it's woefully out of date. I mean, Celine Dion—how retro!
I know we're only a few days into 2021, but it seems an awful lot like 2020. Then again, last year started very differently than it ended, so perhaps there's hope. Pandemic or not, traditions must be upheld. While I would typically have a raucous viewing party of Lindsay Wagner's latest oeuvre, Big Mama Masters allows no visitors into Casa Masters. Instead, I was at the home of a friend in my "bubble." When we sat down to watch a Wagner flick (courtesy of a fan), we discovered the DVD was damaged in the post. As luck would have it, this friend asked me last year if I could track down a 1977 made-for-TV retelling of It's a Wonderful Life—suspiciously titled It Happened One Christmas. So we watched my bootleg copy of this forgotten film starring Marlo Thomas, Wayne Rogers, Orson Welles and Cloris Leachman as Clara the Angel (with the worst Cockney accent this side of My Fair Lady). While not what I'd call a "classic," it passed the time adequately.
On TV, we saw Mariah Carey pop in on Coop and Cohen, winched into one of her 9-year-old daughter's dresses. If she inhaled, she'd have popped out in HD! Meanwhile, Ryan Seacrest looked positively petrified on ABC, while Jennifer Lopez appeared dismayed that someone actually turned her mike on. And in case you don't know, the few people in Times Square were actually invited first responders. Oh, those poor people.
Closer to the equator, Jeffrey Sanker threw a party for gay revelers. At first, I thought perhaps Puerto Vallarta was allowing gatherings. However, in the state of Jalisco, parties are banned. But Nuevo Vallarta (in the neighboring state of Riviera Nayarit) allowed them. The festivities were moved, with enforced limited capacity, temperature checks and mandatory masks. As a further precaution, Sanker asked revelers to keep the address secret and banned photos and videos. That didn't stop people from sending snaps into BillyMasters.com.
Before moving on, let's wrap up 2020. Tyler Posey placed the star on his tree bottomless. Well, perhaps not bottomless—he was, after all, in the photo! Meanwhile, Elton John dressed as Santa and promised to resume his farewell tour. All snaps on our website.
And we said farewell to 2020 on "Billy Masters LIVE" with a wildly popular year-end edition. Tens of thousands have tuned in so far, making it our most-viewed episode. We'll be back with new shows soon. In the meantime, check out all 75 episodes of season one on Billy Masters TV on YouTube, or at BillyMasters.com/TV.
We'd also like to acknowledge the passing of Broadway great Rebecca Luker, only months after revealing she had ALS. "Party Monster" killer Michael Alig died of a suspected heroin overdose. And Marcus D'Amico—who appeared as Mouse in the first miniseries based on Tales of the City—died of pneumonia at 55.
To the world, she was Mary Ann on Gilligan's Island. But I want to remember my friend Dawn Wells. Let me take you back about 15 years to LAX at the height of the holiday season. A storm was raging back east and most flights were cancelled. People were frantically trying to get one of the last remaining seats to New York. I found myself near the front of the line when I saw Dawn. We'd only met briefly in the past, but I wasn't gonna let Mary Ann go to the back of the line. I silently slipped her in front of me (a technique I've perfected over the years). As the gate attendant tried to find her a single seat, she corrected them. "Two seats—for me and my friend," she said, gesturing to me. She got us on that flight (in business class, if I recall correctly) and we had a great time. Rest in peace.
Three of HBO's most popular series are headed down the path to reboot. The network has announced that new versions of True Blood and In Treatment are in the works. However, the return of Sex and the City got the most attention. Not surprisingly, only three of the original co-stars have signed on—with Kim Cattrall once again demurring, saying,"I'm lucky enough to have the choice." Well, the gay fans are not having it. No quartet, no viewers.
Our first "Ask Billy" question of the year comes from Daniel in Suffolk, England: "Any updates on Rogan O'Connor?"
Avid readers may recall Rogan, who has appeared on several UK reality shows and occasionally strips with the group Dreamboys. He's now started an OnlyFans page. When asked what people should expect, Rogan said, "They can expect a lot of dick and a lot of ass." He added, "I'm still doing lots of TV shows, so for the filth, you do need to open up your DMs, and that's where the real naughtiness begins." While I think the word "lots" may be overstating things a tad, the word "filth" does ring a bell. You can check Rogan out on BillyMasters.com.
When a current star is using our old name, it's time to end yet another column. For all of you at HBO, I have two words for you: "Golden Palace." Give Cattrall WHATEVER she wants, or move on. To everyone else, trust me—things will get better. In the meantime, keep checking out BillyMasters.com—the site that will always put a smile on your face. If you need a reason to go on, write me at Billy@BillyMasters.com , and I promise to get back to you before I book Lindsay on "Billy Masters LIVE"! Until next time, remember: One man's filth is another man's bible.
