Lance, girl, we knew one of you N'Sync men was The Gay. We just weren't sure which one. Yes, dear readers, Lance Bass of N'Sync has flung himself out of the closet and I couldn't be happier. We need more people openly shouting at the top of their lungs, 'I'm Gay!'
I was at the Jewels ( yes, I say Jewels 'cause I'm a native ) and I looked down to see an issue of People with the words 'I'm Gay' splattered across the front. It made me feel good. I hope the millions of other people in this country who pass by the same supermarket magazine racks each week get the subtext of it all; we really ARE out there in full force. The Gay are here to stay.
Style.com is one of those websites I dare not read at work. Not because my co-workers don't know I'm a big old queer, but because I can get lost on it for hours and hours, living vicariously through each season's runway shows. Plus, any picture of that mess Andre Leon Talley is worth a few laughs.
So as I'm flitting and flouncing through style.com in my office at home, who is quoted but none other than my own personal style icon, miss Linda Evangelista. She uses Botox, isn't afraid to say it, but she does 'like to keep some movement in her face.' Linda is on hiatus from Botox at the moment due to her pregnancy, but she went on to recount a billion other procedures that she will do regularly post-baby and it left me with a warm and fuzzy spot in my heart.
Linda, gorgeous statuesque Linda, the woman who wouldn't get out of bed for some highly-debated sum of money, the Supermodel who embodies both ready-to-wear and haute couture in both attitude and strut, is fallible but still working. And boys and girls, if Linda has flaws, let me be the first to tell you that I got flaws, you got flaws, and we all got flaws.
It's time to celebrate your flaws boys and girls. Grab your belly roll, buck out your teeth, and wear open toed shoes to show everyone those nasty feet that you've been hiding for years. Wear a cut off shirt and show the world your chicken wings. Take that hat off and show everyone your bald spot. And to all of you boys out there with one testicle, wear a shirt that proudly sports the word 'Uniball.'
If we don't flaunt our physical flaws, none of us will ever get over them. Worrying about that stomach roll that flops over the top of your jeans will do very little to reduce its size, yet it'll gnaw away at your self-esteem.
And you never know. Someone might actually like that belly roll. In Yiddish, the saying goes, 'Every pot will find its lid,' and I believe it to be absolutely true. Flaunt your flaws. What could it hurt?
With you in 4/4,