Let's welcome April as three 'outer' planets retrograde and send us into a tizzy. Take heart; the fates find ways to lead us to where we need to be. Keep your feet on the ground and your head above the fray, if you can.
ARIES ( MARCH 21 - APRIL 20 ) Gay Rams take a chance on someone they don't know well or fall head over heels for an exotic stranger. If you keep your wits about you, it might be just another breezy ( or is it blowsy ) affair that tousles your locks but keeps your head attached.
TAURUS ( APRIL 21 - MAY 21 ) Make up an excuse to hang around the house and just relax. But don't become so sedate that you spend hours in front of the tube vegetating. Partners and pals yearn for a bit of your company. Plan festivities that plant you in the epicenter of the party plot.
GEMINI ( MAY 22 - JUNE 21 ) Don't be surprised if you find yourself searching for the right words to express the range of your zesty desires. Relationships need some sprucing up. Plan a romantic getaway that says it all. Partners need more than a stale wind to fill their sails, gay Twin.
CANCER ( JUNE 22 - JULY 23 ) Time is money so don't waste excess energy on wasteful pastimes. If your budget is tight, think of profitable alternatives. If you are a bit more flush than usual, think of new ways to bake your dough and let it rise. Prepare to become well endowed.
LEO ( JULY 24 - AUG. 23 ) Life may be a series of false starts now. Proud Lions want to be recognized for the artistic geniuses they are but the jaded world is asleep. So what? Dance your dance, be your own supporter and the world will eventually catch up to you. And then what??
VIRGO ( AUG. 24 - SEPT. 23 ) Queer Virgins pine for peace and quiet but have trouble finding it. Why ask why? Enjoy the convivial company. There will be someone in particular who will pique your interest, among other things. Be sure to practice safe piquing.
LIBRA ( SEPT. 24 - OCT. 23 ) Proud Libras should say it proud and queer. You will be told that the frank way will not get you what you want. 'They' tell you that it is easier to attract more flies with honey than with vinegar. Do you really want to attract all those flies... ?
SCORPIO ( OCT. 24 - NOV. 22 ) Buff your corporate star and don't be tempted to take the easy route to success. Proud Scorps who delegate to underlings face a revolution but those who put in the sweat equity reap accolades and financial gains. Are you a diva or a doer?
SAGITTARIUS ( NOV. 23 - DEC. 22 ) Prioritize your projects. Some are time wasters. Gay Archers improve their chances for success by getting out and expanding their current circle of contacts. Dive into new social pools and see who swims by. Let's hope it's not another worm on a hook.
CAPRICORN ( DEC. 23 - JAN. 20 ) Rather than sit home alone and count your money, why not share your goodies with a certain goodie or two? Pink Caps could wind up falling in love with love and be swept off their feet. It could cost more than you think. But what a way to go!
AQUARIUS ( JAN. 21 - FEB. 19 ) Ornery Aqueerians create conflicts between pals and partners this April if they are not careful. You want what you want and to be adored for who you are but reality may bite. Will you bite back or chew it for a while?
PISCES ( FEB. 20 - MARCH 20 ) Guppies would prefer to do anything else besides putting their nose to the grindstone at work now. Don't be lazy. Get the job done and don't fall into temptation. Hard work and perseverance are rewarded. At least that is what I am led to believe.
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