with randy pubert
Dangerous Asians
from BPD Excellence
Pubert recruits daredevil Colon Farehole out of the phone booth and into the porn booth to get help with his adult minority report. This S.W.A.T. team will stop bad movies in their tracks and promise a new world with their commentary. So grab your popcorn, your lube and enjoy the ride!
Judging a Porn By Its Cover
Colon: The nail salon creeps me out by my house... talk about your Dangerous Asian.
Pubert: The back cover looks like no budget.
C: Yeah, the pictures look downloaded.
Danger in every corner as our video begins with a photo shoot.
P: How come Asians have such good bodies?
C: Because they live on vegetables and fish.
P: I think it's genetics. That snapping of the pictures is so irritating.
C: You would think they would move in between pictures. Isn't that how posing for pictures works?
P: Why are they not moving? They are caught in the headlights and all oiled up.
Following this, a group of Asian busboys break into a three way in a Chinese restaurant.
C: It's an after hours party in Chinatown.
P: Tiger Wang is the only porn name he could come up with? He has a weird penis.
C: He's been eating some shark fin soup.
P: And this other one is named Steele Butts. Must have been up all night thinking of that one.
C: Bird flu is not the only thing to worry about catching in that booth! This is dangerous for the patrons of this restaurant.
P: Can't you hear it? There is a pube in my pad thai!
C: Listen to the music. This is like a bad rave in Tokyo. Sounds like the Orb playing in the background.
P: I slept with an Asian guy this week.
C: I believe it; when Chi Chi's is closed you go to Panda Express!
P: You know me so well, Colon.
Finally ending our trip to Bangcock with a terrible twosome.
P: What is he doing? Practicing yoga?
C: Being dangerous.
P: He's smoking a cigar. That's living on the edge.
C: It's because he's in the no smoking section.
P: These are two wong fools.
P: They should have called this movie Bad Photo Shoot.
C: Yeah, the only thing dangerous about this movie is the fashion. If you love designer imposter jeans, you will love Dangerous Asians.
Pubert: Finger down the throat
Colon: Finger down the throat
To order this video call 212-643-1636
What do you think of the all-Asian team idea on the new season of Survivor? Pubert@windycitymediagroup.com