Should it really look like ribs...
Now I realize that some vegans are vegan for "health reasons," but many, if not most, gave up meat because they didn't want to hurt animals. Why then, in goddess's name, do they take their mycoplasm protein and tofu and fashion it to look like meat? Surely, this doesn't make it more palatable? Nowandzen.net is where you can buy Unturkey, Unsteak, Unchicken, and Unribs—all meticulously crafted to look just like the real thing. The Unturkey and Unchicken even have a crispy soy "skin." According to the web site, these items are "surprisingly delicious." Uh, yeah, whatever.
...and should it be carbonated?
While we're dealing with fake food, I'd be remiss if I didn't mention Jones' Soda Holiday Pack. Five sodas fashioned to taste like ( brace yourself ) : turkey with gravy, cranberry, mashed potatoes with butter, fruitcake, and [ gag ] greenbean casserole. All are artificially sweetened—natural sweetener would seem odd. They are calorie, carb, and caffeine free. The labels list "natural and artificial flavors." No word on if the sodas are vegan.
Things that make you go Ow
"Ever seen a guy piss out of his balls? You will."
So I read the email from our very own editor, Kirk, recommending this lovely site. After rotten.com and ratemywound.com, he figgered this was right up our alley. Boy howdy, was he right! This is your headquarters for all sorts of body modification info and pics. Find out everything you ever wanted to know about tattoos, skin removal, piercings, embeddings, scarification and on and on and on and on. Sensitive tummy warning. This site is graphic.
On a Serious note
We're always going on about how the WWW is great because of things like Lord of the Peeps and other total wastes of time, bandwith, and energy. Then someone comes along and does something like this, The Holocaust Martyrs' and Heroes' Remembrance Authority, which really shows a meaningful and moving use of the same resources. The online database is a repository of one-page biographies of Holocaust victims ( Pages of Testimony ) . Over 2,000,000 of them are currently in the database. Take some time out from Jibjab and Atom Films, you'll be a better person for it. Never forget.