What, again with this column? And just as I was about to settle in for the evening with a Black Russian and the Sunday Trib crossword puzzle. I'm particularly fond of the Quote Acrostic. Oh the quiet joy of guessing the correct 8 letter word meaning "acrimonious." It is this boring lifestyle I aspire to. But in the mean time...
Give a happy birthday spanking to Randy at Jackhammer. You'll have to spank fairly hard. Years of abuse have left the skin of his ass hard and calloused. Give a feel and see if I'm not wrong. Just kiddin', sexy. Happy 26th!
What a trip hanging out with Tabitha at The Closet. You don't want to know what her response to this week's "most embarrassing utterance during sex" MAFIA question was. Or maybe you were the one to hear it first hand? Anyway, when a very nice young man told us he was singing some R. Kelly, I politely asked him, "Are you going to piss on anybody?" Well Miss Tabitha dropped her shit all over. It was a moment in time.
Check out Tom's ass from Scot's. Who knew Tom had such a fine ass. Get over to Scot's and glimpse Tom's ass for yourself. Nice ass, Tom from Scot's!
InnExile was a blast for Stella and Chicago Beef Divas and Dancers night. Happy 40th to Dennis. As I told him, 40 is the new 30. That seemed to make him smile. But then again, everything does. Look for a great shot of Victor gettin' jiggy with an ear of corn. Anything goes down south, I guess.
Congratulations to The Barony ( now the Empire ) for their record-breaking fundraising efforts during Reign III. Sierra has left a proud legacy. Glad to have been a part of it.
I owe Sarabia about 17 BJ's for helping me set up this week's cover shot. Can't you just eat Jorge up? Seeing him smeared with barbecue sauce was more than my queer heart could handle. Who knew I could become sexually aroused at Man's Country?
Hey DJ Chris at Hydrate – thanks for the water and conversation. It was hell making it back to the booth, but you made it a nice oasis.
The funk cometh! If you are of the lesbionic persuasion, get yo' pussy down to Funky Buddha Lounge on Tuesday nights. It's like a Russ Meyer movie down there with all them busty young things. Meghan, you better accompany me next time. I need a dyke translator. You know, it's not my native tongue.
And if it's dick ye be seekin', see you at Wet for their new Sunday Night night. Brought to you by the folks over at Music-101, the Boom Boom Room people. Hot DJs all night and, I'm sure, more sweaty boys than you can shake a stick at. Then again, I've never seen you shake your stick.
kirk@windycitymediagroup.com
