Eight years ago, while a student at a Catholic high school in suburban Minneapolis, Tyler Duckworth went to the local Barnes & Noble to read about the Gay Games. He'd sneak around the store so no one knew what he was doing—reading reports about the Games in The Advocate. 'I always wished I could go to these Gay Games. I wanted to see what it was like to not be so alone,' said Duckworth, then a closeted swimmer.
Times have changed.
Duckworth, 24, is now openly gay and one of the most high-profile competitors in Gay Games VII. He is a cast member on MTV's Real World: Key West, the popular reality show, with new episodes airing every Tuesday.
Duckworth will be competing in the open water swimming event and the half-marathon.
'I'm just so excited to go [ to Chicago ] and experience [ the Games ] as an out athlete,' said Duckworth. 'I'm looking forward to opening myself up to the experience because I cannot tell you how hard it was at [ past ] swim meets, always knowing I was a little different [ from other swimmers ] . For so long, I felt out of the loop [ and ] so unpopular, even though I was one of the best athletes. For so long, I was singled out.
'The Gay Games … I feel like I'm coming home because I know I'll be among thousands of brothers who know exactly what I have gone through. I'm really excited to feel the camaraderie. Who knows what I'll feel like on opening night, but I'm sure it will be 100 percent overwhelming.
Duckworth's favorite sport is gymnastics, although he has never competed in it. He actually started his sporting life as a hockey player in Minnesota. However, at age 12, he began competitive swimming during the summer, 'and I got really good,' he said. Duckworth eventually quit hockey to focus on swimming, which included twice-a-day training sessions. He qualified for his first nationals at 16.
His goal, a realistic one based on his age-group times, was the 2000 Olympic trials. But Duckworth's life changed forever in 1999, at age 17. In a 'freak accident' at his school, he suffered a broken back, broken right wrist and broken left heel, leaving him in a full-body cast.
'The injury could not have happened at a worse time,' he said. 'The injury ended my dreams of going to the Olympics or competing on an international level.' However, he also tried to see the silver lining around the ominous cloud: 'I like to think the injury changed my life for the better because I got to focus more on academics.'
The injury also led to Duckworth revealing he was gay. 'When you lose your ability to run or walk, let alone bathe yourself, you really look at the importance of things and put things in perspective. That's when I realized I didn't want to keep everything bottled up. Life is too short,' said Duckworth, who announced he was gay shortly after the injury. 'The accident helped put things in perspective and I just knew I had to put everything in perspective, that I had to be out.
'I'm very thankful for that accident because it gave me a lot of strength, physically and emotionally.'
Duckworth overcame his injuries and ultimately landed at Tufts University, a prestigious East Coast school. He continued to excel in swimming. His real-life experiences as an openly gay college athlete were, though, none-too-memorable despite his athletic accomplishments.
'I went to a Catholic [ high school ] in Minneapolis and found more acceptance than I did in college,' he said. 'In Minnesota, my coaches, my team and my friends; everyone was accepting. I got nothing but 100 percent support.
'In college I heard a lot of faggot comments, a lot of gay jokes. And I'm not one to shy away from conflict. It got pretty bad at points.'
It got so bad, in fact, that a team meeting was necessary, or he threatened to quit the team and go to the athletic department about the harassment.
Duckworth was the only openly gay Tufts swimmer of 40 on the team, although he knew four closeted swimmers. 'I went through the struggle alone,' he said, 'but I'm a very strong-willed person—a confident, aggressive person, especially now—and a lot of it is due to that experience.'
Duckworth qualified for the NCAA tournament swimming meet all four years while at Tufts. He retired from competitive swimming in 2004, then ventured into marathon running. He has already run two races, including the prestigious Boston Marathon.
'Other than a couple of marathons that I ran last year, I have not really competed in about two years since I retired from swimming. So, I'm really excited to get back into competing and I'm looking at the Games as kind of the start of my new triathlon career,' he said. 'I'm looking at the Gay Games as my opportunity to get back into the whole competitive vibe, the competitive mode, and just really starting to take my athleticism seriously again.'
In September, Duckworth starts training for his first triathlon, which involves swimming, running and bicycling.
'The Games are my personal celebration of being healthy, celebrating the fact that I will be swimming and running just for the sake of it, for just being able to do it,' he said. 'I'm so appreciative that I can…because I've had those abilities taken away.'
Duckworth will, no doubt, be under the spotlight throughout his stint in Chicago, although it will be nothing like the five-month Real World experience, where cameras follow his every move, reaction, response, every…well, every everything.
'My goal for the Games is to just have fun and try my hardest,' he said. 'I'm using the Gay Games to gauge what the competition is like and, hopefully, come back in four years and do it again, and do better. A lot of people don't know, but, there will be a lot of very good competitors in the triathlon, in the marathon and the water events. I'm hoping to use the Games as a gauge to see where my training needs to be for September.'
Duckworth is not focused on winning a Games medal, but just on finishing his events.
'My hero is [ figure skater ] Michelle Kwan and as great as she is, she's never won [ an Olympic ] gold medal,' he said. 'I kind of have that same mentality when I compete, that when you're out there, it's all about competing and just having fun. Sure, there are people who are more focused on winning the gold, but that's not necessarily me. Oh, sure, I'd like to win every race that I enter, but, I know that I'm not at my peak athletic shape.
'My main goal is to finish and have fun.'
Duckworth has a hectic travel schedule these days, as he's often on the road for weeks at a time. 'When I'm home, I try to train as much as possible,' he said. 'When I'm on the road, I try to be as creative as possible when it comes to working out. I try to be as healthy as possible, but it isn't that easy when you're traveling.'
Duckworth's Real World, the 17th season of the hit reality show on MTV, ended filming last December and started airing this past February.
'They take you and mold you into a character that they want, and that's hard to digest for some cast members,' Duckworth said. 'I remember past cast members telling me, 'Beware, Tyler, they will edit you into what they want you to be.' And they did.
'I wish they would show other parts of my personality, but they want me to be the way they want me to be…and I have to live with that.'
So who is the real Tyler Duckworth? 'A goofy, awkward, weird, funny guy,' he said.
The Real World experience was not always fun, he said, but definitely a learning experience: 'There were good times, but there also were bad times. Would I do it again? Yes, absolutely.'
TYLER DUCKWORTH
AGE: 24
NOW LIVES IN: New York City, 'on a friend's couch'
HIGH SCHOOL: Academy of Holy Angels, Class of 2000
COLLEGE: Tufts, Class of 2004
JOB: Coaching and teaching dance at Columbia University
FAVORITE TEAM: Minnesota North Stars, circa 1991-92: 'When they lost to the Pittsburgh Penguins ( in the 1991 Stanley Cup ) , my world fell apart.'
FAVORITE HOCKEY PLAYER: Mike Modano
BET YA DIDN'T KNOW: He's a classical pianist.
IT'S A FACT: He baby-sat for Dennis Green, the former head coach of the Minnesota Vikings.
IT'S ALSO A FACT: Has a thing for ketchup, Diet Coke and cheese. And he has not had a meal in years that does not incorporate at least two of the three.
GYMNASTICS: Has started taking adult gymnastics classes in Los Angeles, held twice a week. 'It's amazing conditioning. Hey, I may not be in the best swimming shape, but I've never looked better. So I guess it's a good trade off.'
ICE HOCKEY: Is planning to resume playing this fall in New York City.
ICE HOCKEY, ROUND 2: His brother, Jackson, played for Omaha and Lincoln ( Neb. ) in the USHL, the only Tier I junior league in America.
BOSTON MARATHON: 'When I crossed the finish line last year, it kind of was a new beginning. I had been through hell, yet survived.'
IN THE WATER: Duckworth recorded his first National qualify time as a swimmer at age 16, becoming one of the youngest-ever from Minnesota to do so. 'More important, it was one of the first big goals I had ever set for myself—and I accomplished it,' he said.
He competed in the Nationals that year in California.
QUOTE: 'I really struggled in competition in my youth because I always was alone. I was the lone representative for my team, but also, the lone gay swimmer. I know the Gay Games will be a way for a lot of athletes, myself included, to celebrate the fact that they are gay. And also celebrating the fact that they are athletes.'
DREAM VACATION SPOT: Mongolia. 'I've always wanted to live with a nomadic family in Mongolia.'
FAVORITE TV SHOW: Kathy Griffin: My Life on the D-List, which airs on Bravo
FAVORITE FOOD: Pizza
KEY TO STAYING IN SHAPE: Push-ups every day and long runs in the morning
HE'S SINGLE: 'I'm delightfully on the market, to be taken. I'm hoping to find a nice guy, perhaps at the Games.'
DREAM GUY: 'A really dorky athlete'
BOXERS OR BRIEFS: Boxers
