The Radio City Rockettes. At: The Rosemont Theatre, 5400 N. River, Rosemont. Phone: 312-559-1212; $24.50 - $56.50. Runs through: Dec. 2
Massive, sparkly and literally streaming Christmas cheer over the audience at one point, more is more at the Radio City Christmas Spectacular. Why have just one Santa Claus doing a knock-'em-dead tap number when you can fit two dozen Kris Kringles on stage? Starring the iconic, blindingly high-kicking gams of the Rockettes, the show also comes with two camels, four sheep, a donkey named Lincoln and enough hydraulic-powered sets to keep every light in Bethlehem blazing for all 12 days of Christmas. And I do mean Christmas—no 'Happy holidays' equivocation here—Mary, Joseph and the baby Jesus himself show up in the show's gloriously over-the-top Living Nativity.
And here's the thing: It works. Every blasting decibel of A Partridge in a Pear Tree, every neon-lit, Rockefeller Center-sized Christmas tree and every glittery flake of sequin-infused fake snow. It all adds up to a dazzling, gleeful romp as deliriously wonderful as the height of a sugar plum-induced sugar buzz on Christmas Eve. Pinter the Radio City Spectacular ain't. And if you're the serious-minded sort that equates costume budgets of more than $100 with artistic bankruptcy and the inherent evil of capitalism, steer clear of the Rosemont Theatre this month. The aptly named Spectacular is enough to set storefront purists to ripping the hair from their heads in bloody clumps out while proselytizing that the end is nigh.
The production opens with a whiz-bang eye-popper, as a seemingly endless line of Rockettes dressed in skin-tight reindeer suits prance through a perky montage of secular carols a la 'Haul out the Holly.' At one point, most of the lights go out, and the antler headdresses the Rockettes have perched atop their lacquered hairdos light up like casino marquees. It's a laugh-out-loud twinkle-fest.
With the help of a little person who can pop-lock and drop it like it's hot with the bravado of Soulja Boy, Santa busts a move in Santa's Gonna Rock ( 'Let's crank the beat up! To heat these old feet up!' ) . It's one of several numbers that feature a comely octet of singer/dancers whose show-tunes and sunshine interludes give the Rockettes time to change from one fabulous costume to another. The kick line returns behind a breathtakingly beautiful, ice-blue scrim ( and the mists of a well-oiled fog machine ) during the shimmering Christmas Dreams sequence as snowstorms take on the beauty of sapphires.
For gateway Tchaikovsky, the all-bear version of The Nutcracker works as an introduction to classical music that'll have six-year-olds humming the works of the great, gay composer. As for the signature synchronicity of the Rockettes choreography, that gets a tap-happy showcase in The 12 Days of Christmas. And just as they have for the past 75 years, the Rockettes topple amazing precision in The Parade of the Wooden Soldiers.
