Fast food chains are getting better and better at marketing their treats as must-have foods that are more convenient than ever, and easy to eat. For example, Cinnabon has developed the S'more Twist, which offers the high-fat gooiness of the regular Cinnabon, but with a newfound portability. I'm sure mall retailers won't mind shoppers strolling over from Cinnabon with a hand-held puff pastry stuffed with a marshmallow filling, topped with graham cracker bits, and covered in melted chocolate. The drips and stains on the merchandise are J.C. Penney's problem, I guess. If you aren't planning a trip out to the airport or mall anytime soon, don't worry. Cinnabon is hoping to launch their products on otherwise healthy citizens at traditional grocery stores in the near future.
Good For You Fast Food
I think I'll wait for Mr. Goodburger to launch here instead. With only one outlet, opened in downtown Honolulu last February, the vegetarian Mr. Goodburger isn't exactly a chain, but Wes Zane, one of the company's two founders, hopes for 200 Mr. Goodburgers all over the United States by 2005. Plans for a flagship store to open here in July have not come to fruition but the first mainland shop will open in San Francisco in 2003, with more to follow. At Mr. Goodburger, diners can choose from various Tofu Patties flavored to mimic Cajun, Polynesian, or Barbecue dishes. There's also veggie baked fries and tater tots, soups and chili, along with those ubiquitous smoothies.
-Le Fast Food
I know, too healthy for you. Time to head out west then, where European Connection Cafes has 11 outlets in Utah, and plans to expand soon to Las Vegas and Phoenix. The specialty is crepes, and diners get to choose their own fillings. Sure, there's fresh fruit or veggies to choose from, but even I would jump right to the sweet crepes, which feature fillings like ice cream, bananas, and Nutella, and just plain butter and sugar. Whipped cream is an added bonus.
How to Bake a Good Buzz
Or, make them yourself. It seems that certain towns in Pennsylvania are populated with master bakers. At least it seems that way, when sales of Pure Vanilla Extract going through the roof. That's where those nasty substance abuse centers come into play. They're not baking cookies, and they're not convinced that you are, either. They say that some stores are actually removing the extract, which is at least 35% alcohol by volume—or 70 proof, from store shelves, or keeping it behind the counter. There's more alcohol in a little bottle of the extract than in a couple of beers, so a few swigs should give you a nice buzz. Reports link shoplifted bottles, and empties in the corner of parking lots to the vanilla's alcoholic properties.
Don't Say I Didn't Warn You
Does that mean there is a reason to drink Vanilla Coke after all? Actually, Coca Cola is one of the big guns trying to adapt to the changing marketplace as well. Research shows traditional soda pop sales dropping because consumers want something 'fresh and tasty.' Is Coco Cola's Nestle Choglit really that item? Besides having a name that sounds like someone with a cold trying to say 'chocolate,' the drink is dairy based, which sounds a little thick and heavy for a hot afternoon, thirst-quenching treat. Sure, the Choglit uses skim milk, but what about all the sugar? If sales go well on the East Coast, we're next.
One More Warning
ASAP Food Products rivals TCBY (The Country's Best Yogurt) for the most awkward name ever given a food company. ASAP (A Super Amazing Popcorn) is currently pushing new gimmicks to sell their microwave popcorn, like packages featuring Scooby Doo, and The Powerpuff Girls. Meanwhile, an Orville Redenbracher brand corn in Canada comes with a packet of cheddar cheese called a Pour Over to, well, pour over the greasy popcorn, and create a messy trick on your arteries.
Chicago Fattens Up the Nation
Speaking of tricked arteries, sales of breakfast meats have steadily gone up, even while consumption of hot dog items remains flat. And, just who is foisting up these tasty meaty tidbits on citizens, a disproportionate amount of whom are obese or morbidly obese? Kraft and Sara Lee are the top pushers, and they are both headquartered in the Chicago area. Because research shows less and less people know how or are willing to cook, these companies are focusing more and more on already cooked items that can be heated in a microwave, rather than risking that these big folks might slim down if not offered these microwavable treats. Just like Grandma used to make.
While Texas Slims it Down
Is it really a bunch of cattle-loving Lone Stars who care about our health? Apparently, as Frito Lay, headquartered in Austin, is introducing reduced fat versions of their Lay's Chips and Cheetos. While the amount of overall fat will be reduced only a bit, the increasingly demonized saturated fat percentage will drop more significantly in each. On the horizon, are versions of baked Dorito's and a version of Baked Lay's with flecks of broccoli, for those who don't like their vegetables. The dubious nutritional content has not yet been released.
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