Despite her significant loss of recently being defrocked by the United Methodist Church, things are looking up for Irene Elizabeth 'Beth' Stroud.
Stroud spent a weekend in the Windy City to attend panel discussions and Holy Covenant Church's 'Worship Celebration for Reconciling Sunday' held Feb. 12. Stroud preached the morning worship of the celebration to affirm the church's commitment to LGBT people and its advocacy for change within the denomination.
While serving as a pastor at Philadelphia's First United Church of Germantown in 2004, Stroud came out as a lesbian in a covenant relationship with a woman. After a church trial, an appeals process and a final decision in November 2005 by the denomination's 'Supreme Court,' Stroud was stripped of her credentials and found guilty of violating Church policy.
Church policy forbids partnered gays and lesbians from serving as ordained ministers.
Windy City Times sat down for a talk with the busy new mom during her visit.
Windy City Times: Do you think things are slowly changing in terms of the dividedness of the Methodist Church?
Stroud: I think my nature is to be very optimistic about the long-term future. … I mean you could go to a panel discussion like we had yesterday at [Garrett Evangelical Theological Seminary] and hear the perspectives on both sides and just think, 'Oh my gosh, nothing has changed in 10 years.' ... But I find that after what I've been through and what I've experienced … I tend to be treated with respect and kindness at least by conservatives of good faith. I get my share of hate mail, but there are certainly a lot of people of different perspectives who just demonstrate respect for me and my family in the way that they talk to me, and I think that may not have been so 10 years ago. And I think more and more in churches and religious communities, straight people are aware that they have gay and lesbian friends. They're more likely to have personal relationships with people who are gay and lesbian than was true 10 years ago, or to know that they have those relationships. [Laughs.] ... And I think that forces people to think.
Windy City Times: Now, are you still a lay pastor?
Stroud: Yes, I'm still on maternity leave.
Windy City Times: Boy or girl?
Stroud: She's a little girl. She's our foster daughter and she's four months old. … She's a delight and we don't know if she'll be reunited with her birth family or stay with us, but we do know that she won't go from foster home to foster home, and she'll have some stability and continuity. And she's just delightful. She's so much fun. She learned how to smile about a month ago.
Windy City Times: Why stay a part of the church?
Stroud: I think a lot of the reason that I stay in the church has to do with the local congregation where I work. And the type of community that is and the support that they've shown to me on this kind of national scale—certainly I've faced a lot of obstacles and discrimination—but at the same time in this local community that's a part of my daily life. It's so nurturing and life-giving and I have opportunities to do things that I really love to do. I honestly can't think of a better environment to raise a child who's a foster daughter of a lesbian couple that's a different race from her foster parents and may have some special medical needs over time. You know, it's an environment where those things won't make her different. It's an environment where she'll learn that everybody is special and everybody brings unique gifts. It's an environment where she's African American and … she'll have lots and lots and lots of strong, amazing African American men and women in her life who care about her. ...
I think all religious institutions are flawed. For me, I could not be a complete person if I wasn't an active part of the Christian faith community. And any community I might join, if I were to leave the United Methodist Church and go to another community where my ordination credentials wouldn't be questioned, I would still face other issues and other obstacles and I would find other flaws. I really have an opportunity where I am to be in ministry and be in a relationship with people in a unique way. I've realized, until I came out, that many of my colleagues in ministry didn't know that they had relationships with gay people, and weren't forced to kind of come face-to-face with gay and lesbian people as human beings with lives and families and callings and work that they are good at.
Windy City Times: In your congregation, was there anybody who didn't like you coming out?
Stroud: There were certainly people in the congregation who were worried about me and worried about the personal quest in me coming out and the cost to the church. There's certainly been a cost to the church. From the time I came out, for two and a half years, I was constantly absorbed in this legal process. There were meetings to go to and hearings to attend and briefs to file. There's just a lot of stuff to prepare for. There was the media to respond to. And honestly there were times when … the aftermath of coming out took between a third and a half of my professional time to deal with. And there were other things that I could not do that the church needed. I am very tired now [laughs]. And my capacity right now to just do day-to-day ministry at the church is not the same as it was before I went through this ordeal. Not to say I won't, you know, bounce back in the future, and it's been helpful to the church for our stance to be so visible. But at the same time, in terms of the day-to-day business of being a church, there's a cost. But I would say that my congregation is really unanimous, as far as I know, in their support for gay and lesbian people as full participants in every aspect of the life and ministry of the church.
Windy City Times: Even though it came at great cost because you were defrocked and in the spotlight, what gains do you see?
Stroud: When I think about the cost, in terms of losing my credentials, it's not like I was choosing between that and the perfect life. The choice that I had was between coming out and in all likelihood losing my credentials, and staying as I was—sort of in the closet and sort of not. You know, some people were aware of who I was, but only able to talk about it in certain situations. ... I think that would have been a greater cost, long term, for my spiritual health and for my family. We would not have considered parenting in that situation. We just could not see trying to explain to a child that there are situations where you could say you have two moms, and there are situations where you can't. ... In some ways, having gone through this process gave me the freedom to say yes to this wonderful foster placement and this beautiful baby girl.
Windy City Times: Did you think you would lose your credentials?
Stroud: I did. And at the time, when we were at that point where I was in my office watching my e-mail, waiting for the e-mail with the decision, I almost dreaded the possibility of winning more than the possibility of losing at that point. The reality of where my denomination is at this point in history is that not an overwhelming majority, but a majority, of people are not prepared to accept gay and lesbian ordination. It's the law of the church. It was arrived at democratically. If there had been some interpretation of the law that allowed me to win a case, I think it would have put me in a very tenuous and vulnerable position. I think winning would have put me as more of a target for hate than losing. So, there was a little bit of relief. A sense of, 'This is finally over.' But it was also really sad. There was just such a finality to it, knowing there wasn't any further avenue for appeal. And then knowing a lot of people I cared about had poured so much of their time and energy into pursuing the case.
