Windy City Media Group Frontpage News

THE VOICE OF CHICAGO'S GAY, LESBIAN, BI, TRANS AND QUEER COMMUNITY SINCE 1985

home search facebook twitter join
Gay News Sponsor Windy City Times 2021-12-08
DOWNLOAD ISSUE
Donate

Sponsor


  NIGHTSPOTS

Strap This On
by lisa rock
2004-03-31

This article shared 1417 times since Wed Mar 31, 2004
facebook twitter google +1 reddit email


Kindly Strap This On for the legalization of

marriage for everyone:

The Top Ten Reasons Hets are Scared to Let the Homos Get Legally Hitched

10) Planning the

wedding. We can simply spend all of our gay

dollars within our own community i.e. gay

caterers, wedding

planners, florists, etc.

9) Bachelorette parties. Lesbian bars will be

making more money

during these parties and the strippers will be appreciated and treated well. Happy strippers and happy lesbians: that's what America needs.

8) Style. From traditional wedding gowns and

tuxedos to specially made dresses and pant suits, we definitely have our own style. We could create a fashion craze for designers trying to appeal to lesbians.

7) Love. Hand-holding, kissing, remembering anniversaries and birthdays, public displays of affection ... I'd be scared too if I were a straight male. It puts a lot of pressure on them to step up and treat women the way they deserve to be treated.

6) Statistics. We'll simply mess up the numbers for the hets. Relationships that last longer, are more monogamous, less instances of domestic abuse … they're right, we will make an impact on the institution of

marriage. They're just afraid it will be a more positive one.

5) Music. The band or DJ would play music that wouldn't make fools of everyone such as the Chicken Dance. The songs also (hopefully) wouldn't be reminiscent of 80's music about your drunken tumble in the backseat of a car but something meaningful and loving like I'm the Only One by Melissa Etheridge or The Power of Two by the Indigo Girls.

4) Gifts. I think some straight people are afraid to have to go to the

registry at Linens n' Things to pick something out in hers and hers. I'm sure they're more afraid to have to go to the real places you'd register at like Early 2 Bed or Victoria's Secret.

3) Honeymoon. Again, the concept of money comes into play. Kelli O'Donnell said that lesbians and gay men spent over fifty four billion dollars on travel last year. We could use all of our money in our own community on Olivia cruises, R Family Vacations, etc.

2) Raising children. They're afraid their

parenting abilities will be brought into question as we raise healthy, happy and tolerant children where both parents are involved. Plus, the children will never wonder if they were the product of a drunken "accident". They'll know that they were truly planned.

1) Orgasms. Now, I am definitely not suggesting we have better orgasms. We just have them more frequently. And in my

circle of lesbian couples, going down on your partner is not a birthday or anniversary treat!

Lisa Rock is a syndicated columnist based in Chicago. You can reach her at StrapThisOn@aol.com .


This article shared 1417 times since Wed Mar 31, 2004
facebook twitter google +1 reddit email

  ARTICLES YOU MIGHT LIKE

Gay News

VIEWS Hoarders 2022-01-10
- One TV program that I alternately love and hate is Hoarders. The producers send a team of psychologists, organizers and laborers into a person's home and they all work (and argue) about cleaning the place up ...


Gay News

VIEWPOINT For LGBTQ community, the movement behind Jan. 6 is an existential threat 2022-01-08
- The stakes could not be higher. The LGBTQ movement has succeeded beyond our wildest dreams in democratic societies worldwide. Where we have had access to freedom of speech and assembly, remarkable advances have followed. This is ...


Gay News

LETTER Continue the dialogue on racism 2022-01-08
- I am writing this letter to the editor about the article that appeared on the Windy City Times website titled "A look at Northalsted/Boystown bars since 2020 town hall on racism," written by Cris Villalonga-Vivoni. Also, ...


Gay News

LETTER Remembering Archbishop Tutu 2021-12-28
- Archbishop Desmond Tutu passed away in Cape Town, South Africa, on Dec. 26 at the age of 90. In 1984, he won the Nobel Peace Prize in recognition of his efforts to bring about a peaceful transition to a society with ...


Gay News

VIEWS Remembering our sister-friend bell hooks 2021-12-16
- bell hooks died on Dec. 15, 2021, at 69, in Kentucky. As a Black Appalachian, bell hooks was inarguably one of the nation's prominent feminist scholars and authors, and a friend to everyone she met. Last ...


Gay News

VIEWS Will Smollett's hoax affect public perception of hate crimes? 2021-12-13
- Former Empire actor Jussie Smollett was recently found guilty on five of the six counts of felony disorderly conduct for concocting an elaborate racist and homophobic assault against himself. Each Class 4 felony count can land ...


Gay News

SAVOR Sweetwater Tavern & Grille 2021-12-04
- The popular Loop spot Sweetwater Tavern & Grille—which specializes in contemporary U.S. cuisine, and which is part of the Bottleneck Management stable of restaurants—has a lot going for it. First, there are the views of the ...


Gay News

LETTER TO THE EDITOR Thanksgiving is a time to reflect 2021-11-24
- Thanksgiving is a time to be thankful for a God that created us and loves us. The sins of racism, sexism, ageism and classicism are neoclassic examples of how we have fallen short. We have come ...


Gay News

VIEWS Young people need to listen to LGBTQ elders' intergenerational experiences 2021-11-20
- For one of my first Windy City Times assignments, I was lucky enough to spend nearly three hours interviewing longtime LGBTQ+-rights activist Michael O'Connor. As queer individuals living in Chicago in 2021, we had plenty in ...


Gay News

VIEWS Reporting on queers of color needs to investigate absence as much as presence 2021-11-19
- Earlier this month, I pitched a Windy City Times article that sought to explore how role playing games (RPGs), such as Dungeons & Dragons, enable queer people of color (QPOC) to explore their gender and sexuality ...


Gay News

VIEWS In defense of the word 'lesbian' 2021-11-19
- When I decided to come out to my mom, I wanted to wait until I could say the word "lesbian" out loud. But as I sat her down, I tripped over the long string of letters. "Mom, I'm gay," I blurted ...


Gay News

VIEWS Google and Chicago's segregated LGBTQ+ community 2021-11-19
- I was a little baby queer when I moved to Chicago last year. I come from a traditional, cookie-cutter Connecticut town where Vineyard Vines and Sunday school were the standards. So, for a LatinX queer person—who ...


Gay News

OP-ED The Black church was one of R. Kelly's enablers 2021-10-13
- The long-awaited justice for R. Kelly's survivors finally came last month when a New York federal jury found him guilty of racketeering and sex trafficking. For nearly 30 years, underage Black girls and their families have ...


Gay News

VIEWS Finding the Crossroads 2021-10-08
By Martha Miller - The first time I saw a psychic, I was 19 and my friend Sandy and I drove to Jacksonville to see an old woman who read cards. We were young and it was fun going to her old house where a ...


Gay News

TRAVEL Conde Nast readers select The Gwen as Chicago's best hotel 2021-10-05
- Conde Nast Traveler's readers have spoken—and their views of Chicago's hotels are distinctly different from those of another top travel publication. While Viceroy Chicago topped Travel + Leisure's readers' list of local spots to stay, ...


 



Copyright © 2022 Windy City Media Group. All rights reserved.
Reprint by permission only. PDFs for back issues are downloadable from
our online archives. Single copies of back issues in print form are
available for $4 per issue, older than one month for $6 if available,
by check to the mailing address listed below.

Return postage must accompany all manuscripts, drawings, and
photographs submitted if they are to be returned, and no
responsibility may be assumed for unsolicited materials.
All rights to letters, art and photos sent to Nightspots
(Chicago GLBT Nightlife News) and Windy City Times (a Chicago
Gay and Lesbian News and Feature Publication) will be treated
as unconditionally assigned for publication purposes and as such,
subject to editing and comment. The opinions expressed by the
columnists, cartoonists, letter writers, and commentators are
their own and do not necessarily reflect the position of Nightspots
(Chicago GLBT Nightlife News) and Windy City Times (a Chicago Gay,
Lesbian, Bisexual and Transegender News and Feature Publication).

The appearance of a name, image or photo of a person or group in
Nightspots (Chicago GLBT Nightlife News) and Windy City Times
(a Chicago Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender News and Feature
Publication) does not indicate the sexual orientation of such
individuals or groups. While we encourage readers to support the
advertisers who make this newspaper possible, Nightspots (Chicago
GLBT Nightlife News) and Windy City Times (a Chicago Gay, Lesbian
News and Feature Publication) cannot accept responsibility for
any advertising claims or promotions.

 
 

TRENDINGBREAKINGPHOTOS







Sponsor
Sponsor


 



Donate


About WCMG      Contact Us      Online Front  Page      Windy City  Times      Nightspots      OUT! Guide     
Identity      BLACKlines      En La Vida      Archives      Advanced Search     
Windy City Queercast      Queercast Archives     
Press  Releases      Join WCMG  Email List      Email Blast      Blogs     
Upcoming Events      Todays Events      Ongoing Events      Bar Guide      Community Groups      In Memoriam      Outguide Categories      Outguide Advertisers      Search Outguide      Travel      Dining Out      Privacy Policy     

Windy City Media Group publishes Windy City Times,
The Bi-Weekly Voice of the Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Trans Community.
5315 N. Clark St. #192, Chicago, IL 60640-2113 • PH (773) 871-7610 • FAX (773) 871-7609.