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Strap This On
by Lisa Rock
2006-02-15

This article shared 1515 times since Wed Feb 15, 2006
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I think we're overcharged for everything. Cows aren't making better milk yet the price seems to go up every year. Yes, I know gas has gone up. But the milk isn't any better. Anyhow, I think as lesbians and gay men, there are things we shouldn't be paying for at all. We don't seem to benefit from everything as fellow Americans. At least not since W took office. We are all entitled to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. So strap this on for February...

THE TOP TEN THINGS QUEERS SHOULD RECEIVE FOR FREE

10 ) Health care. Just based on simple rudeness that we've all had to deal with at a doctor's office as they try to understand why I couldn't possibly be pregnant. They've actually come back to me after taking a blood test and told me I wasn't pregnant. When I do buy the sperm donor over the internet, then they can do that.

9 ) Condoms, dental dams, and any other safe sex products. If it wasn't for the strength of our community, HIV awareness would never have happened. Let's keep it up!

8 ) Art. Statistically, we're the ones making it. Why should we have to pay for it? This should include theatre, film, etc. I still say we need to have one week in particular where we all stay home from work ( and go on vacation somewhere warm, of course ) just to show the world exactly where we are.

7 ) Batteries. Lesbians have single-handedly kept every battery manufacturer in business. Maybe it's just the amount of time we seem to spend in bed, but batteries just don't last as long for us in vibrators. We should at least get a buy-one-get-one-free deal.

6 ) Social Security. Having just dealt with the death of my dad, I realize how my mom gets my dad's social security. That's not going to happen for us. So since there won't be much left by the time I'm of age, why should I have to pay for any of it? Let's contribute to the new lesbian and gay retirement communities.

5 ) Decorating materials. Home Depot should hand us gift cards as we walk in the door. Our homes and condos will inevitably end up on some Tour of Homes or Better Homes and Gardens. It's more free advertising for them.

4 ) Property taxes. I don't have children yet. When I do, I'll contribute my share.

3 ) Music. Simple. They play the music in our clubs. We make it cool. It sells.

2 ) Salons/Hair Care Products: Same concept here. We make it all the latest craze.

1 ) Clothing. Whatever we wear becomes the latest fashion. As we walk into a store, they should hand us the hair products, let us choose our clothing for the day, and download music onto our IPODs ( all free ) .

I will be doing my show at Davenport's: Girls Girls Girls: A Coming Out Cabaret

Wednesdays in February at 8 PM. Call ( 773 ) 278-1830 for reservations.


This article shared 1515 times since Wed Feb 15, 2006
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