Pictured: The Passion of Dracula.
Halloween is nearly here and Chicago-area theaters have enough vampires, monsters and bloody killers to satisfy anyone with a gander for ghoulishness on stage.
To help the undecided, here's a list like the niche marketing applied to cable TV and specialty magazines. After all, not everyone loves blood-and-guts slasher flicks the same way others embrace an homage to silver screen divas through drag and camp.
—Home fixer-uppers: Viewers of HGTV and PBS' This Old House will want to check out First Folio Theatre's The Passion of Dracula. No, the famed vampire's passion isn't redecorating his coffin in this 1977 version. Historic home renovators will want to check out First Folio's historic venue of the Mayslake Peabody Estate in Oak Brook to see all the improvements and what still needs extra finishing. Continues through Nov. 2; 630-986-8067
—Nature lovers: Theatre-Hikes' niche is combining theater with nature at the Morton Arboretum in Lisle. So encounter Dracula in the great outdoors as Theatre-Hikes mounts Hamilton Deane and John L. Balderston's famed 1927 adaptation of Bram Stoker's classic novel. Don't forget to bring blankets and bug spray, along with cloves of garlic. Continues through Oct. 26; 630-725-2066
—Post-modern feminists: Anyone who has ever taking a women's studies course should be keen to find out how Megan Wells transforms Bram Stoker's novel Dracula into a one-woman show for Village Players Theatre in Oak Park. It might be intriguing enough to include in your dissertation on modern interpretations of English horror literature. Continues through Oct. 26; 866-764-1010
—Puppet masters: It's yet another theatrical take on Dracula, but Incurable Theater's The Curious Hold of the Demeter is different since it features a cast of bloodsucking puppets. Continues through Oct. 25 at the Storefront Theatre; 312-742-8497
—Fans of the Saw and Hostel film franchises: Oracle Productions' yearly gross-out spectacle-with-a-shortened-attention span goes medical in Disturbed! III. See what happens when a mentally unstable artist turns to human flesh as the raw material for his sick sculptures. Continues through Nov. 1; 773-244-2980
—Fans of the Friday the 13th and Halloween film franchises: If you're more old-school with your bloody slasher flicks, check out Annoyance Theatre's revival of its inaugural 1987 show, Splatter Theatre. Watch the stereotypical denizens of horror flicks get bumped off one by one in increasingly nasty and messy ways. Continues through Nov. 1; 773-561-4665
—Political post-modernists: In Frankenstein in Love, out horror master Clive Barker mixes Mary Shelley's classic monster story with a political revolution in a fictional South American country. Will Act for Food lovingly presents the Chicago premiere of Barker's drama at the Cornservatory through Nov. 1; 773-327-9725
—Dollar-store penny pinchers: Dramatis Personae promises more creatures for your hard-earned cash in Monster Mash. Dracula, Frankenstein, the Mummy and more monsters smash together at the Gorilla Tango Theatre through Oct. 31; 773-598-4549
—Foodies and Greek scholars: The classical Greek tragedy Medea gets mixed up with fine dining in Sara Kay Snider's dark revenge comedy Blood Sausage. Just don't ask what's on the menu at the Cornservatory through Nov. 11; 312-409-6435.
—Rod Serling lookalikes: The premise of Night Falls is to present four 'unseen' horror stories of 1960s TV. But don't think The Twilight Zone, unless you want a copyright infringement case slapped on you. Continues through Nov. 2 at the Annoyance Theatre; 773-561-4665
—Long-run aficionados: London audiences can't seem to get enough of The Woman in Black. This stage adaptation of Susan Hill's creepy ghost story has been playing there since 1989. See it stateside at Cicero's Jedlicka Performing Arts Center through Nov. 8; 708-656-1800
—Séance seekers: Neil Tobin's longstanding gig of Supernatural Chicago at the Excalibur Nightclub also features his annual Houdini Séance on Halloween Night. Ongoing; www.supernaturalchicago.com
—Victoriana collectors: Robert Louis Stevenson's classic novella Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde suggested an unseemly side to Victorian respectability. Pull back that dual layered cloak in Jeffery Hatcher's stage adaptation at Skokie's Northlight Theatre through Oct. 26; 847-673-6300
—Students of Shakespeare: I would be remiss to mention Shakespeare's Scottish Play this Halloween season. Chicago Shakespeare Theatre teams with the Chicago Public Schools to present the student production CPS Macbeth through Oct. 25; 312-595-5600
—Joan Crawford fanatics: Joan Crawford may have been a silver screen goddess in her youth, but as she neared then end of her life, Crawford was reduced to cheap horror fare like the circus-themed Berserk! Count on Hell in a Handbag Productions to spoof this aspect of Crawford's career in the Midwest premiere of Tim Wilkins & Kevin Remington's spoof Haywire! If there's one thing we need more of, it's an axe-wielding Crawford. Continues at Bailiwick Repertory through Nov. 15; 800-838-3006
E-mail scottishplayscott@yahoo.com .