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Pretzel Logic
by David J. Magdziarz

This article shared 3293 times since Wed Mar 9, 2005
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From Mardi Gras grist to Bourbon Street bars, blues and beads, here's a second attempt by me to turn my recent vacation down south into a valid business expense.

Ku Klux Kween?

In the Mardi Gras Museum in Jackson Square, there is a captain's robe from the Krewe of Proteus ( 'krewes' are organizations/societies that sponsor various Mardi Gras events ) that looks like what Liberace would have worn if he was a member of the KKK.

The 'Krewe Cut'

The older krewes often excluded ( or still exclude ) certain minorities and/or ethnic groups, so I really think New Orleans needs a gay male Jewish krewe ( 'Jewe krewe?' ) , if for no other reason that they could call themselves... .

So Why Isn't There A Mardi Gras Booth At IML?

In some Cajun communities Mardi Gras is celebrated with 'runs', which feature mostly costumed men on horseback who ride from house to house begging for the ingredients to make gumbo. In many of these runs the men will whip or pretend to whip each other, often with whips fashioned out of burlap.

Follow That Neon Rainbow

The first neon lights were used on a New Orleans Mardi Gras parade float back in 1938 by a krewe known as the 'Knights of Hermes,' and the three lights were in the shape of rainbows.

Michael Jackson's Favorite Dessert?

The king cake, a Mardi Gras tradition, is an oval, ring-shaped pastry that has a little plastic doll of a Caucasian baby boy, representing the Christ Child, hidden inside. If you're at a party and you get the piece with the doll in it, next year it's your turn to throw the party. Why do I get the feeling Michael Jackson would never end up playing host on account of his simply eating the doll?

Lawyer Bon Temps Roulez

I wonder how many people have sued bakeries and/or the hosts of parties because they accidentally swallowed a king cake Christ Kid?

Original... Or Maybe Not

There's a Bourbon Street Bar known as 'Ron Dodge's Original Tropical Isles,' although you can see the original sign read 'Papa Joe's Original Tropical Isles.'

Killing Sales

When I told the owner of a French Quarter antique shop that I was browsing to see what caught my interest, she replied 'There's a phrase for that type of interest, it's called killing time.'

The Non-AA T-Shirt

Slogan printed on a T-shirt for sale in French Quarter gift shops: 'I'm not an alcoholic. Alcoholics go to meetings. I'm a drunk.'

She's Marva-lous!

On my trip to New Orleans last July I first heard an excellent New Orleans-based blues singer by the name of Marva Wright, and while I hoped to see her again this time.

She's A Singer, Not A Wrighter

The sign on the window of a very upscale venue called 'The Parlor at Storyville,' on Bourbon Street, had Marva's photo on it, and a hand-printed sign said she performed 'Tues. thru Thrus.'

Bourbon Street Blues

Even though it was a Tuesday night, Marva was missing, so I went into a another Bourbon Street blues bar where I heard a Willie Nelson song ( 'You Were always On My Mind' ) , followed by a John Denver song ( 'Country Roads' ) , followed by an Ella Fitzgerald/ Bobby Darin Song ( 'Mack the Knife' ) , and why couldn't I have been there on Thrusday night?

Laissez Boner Temps Roulez

A guy did flash his Andouille sausage for some beads while I was walking down Bourbon Street one night, and after four trips down there ( New Orleans, not his nether regions ) , it's about damn time.

You can send your photos of Bourbon Street bead catchers to .

This article shared 3293 times since Wed Mar 9, 2005
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