Amtrak recently had really cheap fares to New Orleans, so right before the Big Snow we had mid-January, I was making my way to the Big Easy…
Did She See Me At IML?
While having dinner on the train with some fellow Amtrak travelers during the trip south, one of the people at my table asked what I did for a living. I told her I used to be an attorney, but went back to graduate school so I could get an education degree so I could teach elementary school. Her response was, 'Oh, sort of like that Jack Ryan guy.'
Was The Garden Guy A Pansy? - Part One
Once I arrived, I first stayed with my friends Mike and Christian, former Chicagoans who now live in Gulfport, MS. Mike and I drove to Bellingrath Gardens in Mobile, AL. Walter Bellingrath made his money as a Coca Cola executive, and he married his secretary, who was about 11 years younger than he, but they never had any kids. He bought the land that is now Bellingrath Gardens back in 1917 on the advice of his doctor who told him he needed to learn how to play. He 'played' by originally turning the place into an all-male retreat for himself and his friends to go fishing. Did I mention that the Bellingraths never had any kids?
Was The Garden Guy A Pansy? - Part Two
They slept in separate beds, too.
Was The Garden Guy A Pansy? - Part Three
He was also a director of the local Y.M.C.A..
Was The Garden Guy A Pansy? - Part Four
After Mrs. B. died in 1943 at the age of 65, Mr. B., who passed away in 1955, never remarried.
Camping It Up
The Gardens were known for the first 15 years as 'Bellcamp'.
Laissez Boot Temps Roulez - Part One
While I was walking around New Orleans, in Jackson Square to be specific, a shoe-shine guy called out saying he could make my boots all shiny. Since my boots were deerskin, which doesn't get shiny, I just kept walking, but then the guy yelled out, jokingly, 'Oh, you're ignoring me. You must be a Republican.' It was funny. Not funny enough to give him some money, but it was funny.
And An Hour Later You're Cursed Again
Most of the voodoo dolls sold in French Quarter gift shops are made in China.
Take This Job And Fuck It
Conversation overheard in a French Quarter gift shop as two women were looking at a T-shirt that said 'Fuck you, you fucking fuck': Q: 'But where would you ever wear it?' A: 'At work.'
Truth In T-Shirt Messaging
T-shirt slogan found in just about every gift shop in the French Quarter: 'I got bourbon faced on Shit Street.'
Laissez Boot Temps Roulez - Part Two
On my last evening in New Orleans I was walking down Bourbon Street while this guy wearing nothing but a cowboy hat, cowboy boots, spurs, and a pair of tighty whities with the words 'Naked Cowboy' written across the back of them was walking in the other direction, playing a guitar, and singing 'I'm the naked cowboy…,' and it was nice to see that the New Orleans Welcome Wagon heard I was in town, even if they were a bit late.
If you're the Naked Cowboy, my e-mail address is PretzelLogicDave@aol.com . If you're the attorney for the Bellingrath estate, sorry, I don't have e-mail.