Somebody recently asked me why I don't mention gay favorites like Beyonce and Kelly Clarkson more in my column. The answer is simple: I am not fond of most of their music. Lady Gaga and Jennifer Hudson are two of the few popular singers who rule the airwaves and video bars that I like.
This summer, Gwen Stefani is reuniting with No Doubt for a grand tour. No Doubt returns to the early '80s with a one-off cover of "Stand and Deliver" by Adam and the Ants, as heard on Gossip Girl. This should be no surprise, as the Californian quartet scored a hit with a cheap karaoke version of Talk Talk's classic "It's My Life" for a 2003 greatest-hits package. This is a far cry from No Doubt's honest "Simple Kind of Life" and party anthem "Hella Good." Stefani's solo efforts have become an embarrassment. Just try sitting through "Rich Girl." At least courtesy of "Hollaback Girl," I can be assured that the word bananas will not be misspelled. Not all of Stefani's work is deplorable. Her collaborations with Moby on "Southside" and Eve on "Let Me Blow Your Mind" are genius, having her explore other genres. I am quite forgiving, though, especially since No Doubt drummer Adrian Young is comfortable parading around au naturale. No Doubt will be stopping in Chicagoland for a concert at First Midwest Bank Amphitheatre, 19100 South Ridgeland, Tinley Park, on Saturday, July 11, with Paramore opening. On some tour dates, No Doubt has the bi-fronted The Sounds on the bill.
Surely Stefani will run into Fergie at the spelling bee. Having started out as the big vocalist in the girl group Wild Orchid, Fergie launched into superstardom as the singer on Black Eyed Peas' hits "My Humps" and "Don't Phunk with My Heart." Fergie's inevitable solo bow, The Dutchess, is chock full of hits, but the only noteworthy material here is "Big Girls Don't Cry" and the could-have-been-better "Clumsy." The latter cleverly samples Little Richard's classic "The Girl Can't Help It." Recently, the now-married Fergie discussed her bisexuality with The Sun. The Black Eyed Peas are regrouping for the album The E.N.D., now out via Interscope. The E.N.D. features the chart-topper "Boom Boom Pow."
It may seem premature, but I want to crown "Jai Ho! ( You Are My Destiny ) " by The Pussycat Dolls and A.R. Rahman as the worst collaboration of 2009. This reworking of the track from Slumdog Millionaire has enough computerized vocals to last Cher's next farewell tour. Now, front woman Nicole Scherzinger is being listed separately from the group on videos and singles. Weren't her solo singles "Whatever U Like" and "Baby Love" a big enough serving of humble pie? The Dolls' second album, Doll Domination, is a gimmick gone too far. Surprisingly, the dancing ensemble's recording career got off to a good start with the fantastic jazzy number "Sway" for the film Shall We Dance? Here, the gals smartly played up their saucy burlesque image. Also, the members lack individuality that predecessors The Go-Go's and, dare I say it, The Spice Girls possess. Earlier this year, the Pussycat Dolls toured with Britney Spears. Thankfully, there was not a power outage, where the performers would have to rely on singing in an unplugged fashion without depending on backing tracks.
Britney Spears is still riding the wave of her comeback with her latest, Circus. I believe Spears' 2007 meltdown stemmed from the fact that she realized she made it this far with minimal talent and little input in her career, on top of the demands of being a mother. My sympathy for her is dulled by the fact that she remains in L.A. and plays the love/hate games with paparazzi. If Spears is sincere about a complete recovery, she would retire from the industry and live off of her royalties elsewhere. A handful of songs like "Everytime," "Slave 4 U" and "Stronger" are highlights in her career, but her weak, nasally voice is too much. Spears is the poor man's Janet Jackson.
At every concert, interview, red-carpet appearance and award show, Beyonce should be thanking Diana Ross and Tina Turner as she coasts down the roads they paved. Sure, she looks hot in uniform in the video to "If I Were a Boy" and in the stylish video to "Beautiful Liar." This duet with Shakira is co-written by Boy George's protégé Amanda Ghost, who also penned James Blunt's "Beautiful" and Jordin Sparks' "Tattoo." Dance floors ignite once "Single Ladies" comes on, with many aping the superstar's choreography. Beyonce's I am... Tour heats things up at the United Center, 1901 W. Madison, Friday July 17. One thousand tickets to Beyonce's Chicago concert will be discounted to $20.
Does Kelly Clarkson's number-one hit "My Life Would Suck without You" sound familiar? It comes across as the unofficial sequel to her anthem "Since U Been Gone." In the interim, Clarkson released the very personal My December, clashing with studio heads in the process. Rightfully so, the American Idol winner insisted, as being the singer-songwriter of the set, she should have say over the corporate honchos. Rumor has it that Clarkson agreed to return to her pop roots if My December would see the light of day in the fashion she intended. Clarkson's earlier work includes the impressive "The Trouble with Love Is" and "Breakaway." At the MTV Video Music Awards in 2005, Clarkson closed the show with a celebratory performance of "Since U Been Gone." Unfortunately, her voice sounded damaged, which leaves me wondering about the longevity of her career.
Reigning as the industry's golden child, Justin Timberlake seemingly can do no wrong. Nowadays, he almost can dodge any mention of his former boy band NSync or his ties to Nipplegate. But is it wrong for me to like his music when it is done by somebody else or when he only has lesser role in the song? Such is the case with the Cliks' remake of J.T.'s "Cry Me a River" or his appearance on Ciara's latest "Love Sex Magic." Otherwise, Timberlake acts like Ashton Kutcher trying to relive Michael Jackson's heyday. Although his movie career has stalled, Timberlake has his hands in MTV's new Punk'd-like program The Phone.
With pop music, remove the pretty peel and find some substance with underrated LGBTA artists like Joshua Klipp, Kirsten Price, The Gossip, Girl in a Coma, Cazwell and The Cliks, all of whom I mention regularly in my column.
