Windy City Media Group Frontpage News


home search facebook twitter join
Gay News Sponsor



Personal Growth or Stagnation: Art in Progress
by Vicky Nabors

This article shared 3141 times since Sun Jan 1, 2006
facebook twitter google +1 reddit email

2000, 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004, 2005—2006! For some reason, I keep thinking back to the fear and euphoria of Y2K. It seems like yesterday, but five years of my life and your life have actually come and gone. That's enough time to have earned a high-school or college degree. Enough time for a baby ( like my granddaughter born 1/9/2000 ) to grow into a very tall kindergartener; a baby no more. Five years seems like a short time, but it's long enough for significant changes to occur in our lives; especially personal growth. Have you grown, or are you in the same place you were five years ago: self/beliefs, career, family, relationships?

Some measure growth externally, by: material purchases ( house, car, name-brand items ) , and/or by career status. I look inside of myself to measure personal growth: my level of thinking, understanding and accountability ( i.e. today's maturity versus yesterday's immaturity ) . Some examples: Five years ago, I believed the idea of 'forever' in intimate relationships was a joke; today, I know that it's possible. Five years ago, I hated being called 'stud' ( I hate labels ) ; today, I understand that the term is used by others to help them better relate to my butch mystique—that's cool.

Five years ago, I thought all bisexuals and gay male sexual behaviors were disgusting; today, I respect the reality that we define ourselves according to our reality ( our truth ) . Who am I to judge? Five years ago, a date was an opportunity for a potential booty-call, ( being honest ) ; today, a date means enjoying an evening with another person for socialization, entertainment, and/or getting-to-know you purposes. Five years ago, I didn't believe in gay marriage because lesbians didn't seem to take it seriously; today, my companion of two years has changed my perspective. Five years ago, I thought my body was invincible and often mistreated it by: overloading it with junk, too much salt, ignoring my asthma, boozing it up, and not getting enough exercise and sleep; today, I respect my body because several friends and acquaintances have died from lack of respecting theirs.

Five years ago, I thought the American society owed me something, especially since I struggled to earn two degrees; today, I know that nobody owes me anything. I have to go out and compete for everything I get—or go without. Five years ago, I wished I'd never given birth to my daughter and son ( they were horrible and evil ) ; today, I'm proud of the job I've done alone ( they're wonderful adults, soon to be college grads ) . Five years ago, I secretly wished I were: straight ( being a butch lesbian was difficult and often hurt ) , thinner ( tired of being big-Vic ) , and darker in complexion ( not Black enough for many, stung ) ; today, I celebrate all that makes me uniquely me. Five years ago, even though I'd always excelled, I hated being called smart ( it's difficult to fit in ) ; today, I accept my profound analytical and logic-oriented reality and understand that—it's just me, and that's a good thang.

Now pose this question to yourself, 'Five year ago I thought ... and today I ... ' to see if you can identify 10 areas of internal personal growth. The answer should be a wake-up call for many. We're much more than liberated lesbians and gays—we're actually art in progress. Why not work on your self-portrait this year; incomplete art projects are simply incomplete—but a finished product is a masterpiece. Happy New Year!

This article shared 3141 times since Sun Jan 1, 2006
facebook twitter google +1 reddit email

Windy City Media Group does not approve or necessarily agree with the views posted below.
Please do not post letters to the editor here. Please also be civil in your dialogue.
If you need to be mean, just know that the longer you stay on this page, the more you help us.

Copyright © 2021 Windy City Media Group. All rights reserved.
Reprint by permission only. PDFs for back issues are downloadable from
our online archives. Single copies of back issues in print form are
available for $4 per issue, older than one month for $6 if available,
by check to the mailing address listed below.

Return postage must accompany all manuscripts, drawings, and
photographs submitted if they are to be returned, and no
responsibility may be assumed for unsolicited materials.
All rights to letters, art and photos sent to Nightspots
(Chicago GLBT Nightlife News) and Windy City Times (a Chicago
Gay and Lesbian News and Feature Publication) will be treated
as unconditionally assigned for publication purposes and as such,
subject to editing and comment. The opinions expressed by the
columnists, cartoonists, letter writers, and commentators are
their own and do not necessarily reflect the position of Nightspots
(Chicago GLBT Nightlife News) and Windy City Times (a Chicago Gay,
Lesbian, Bisexual and Transegender News and Feature Publication).

The appearance of a name, image or photo of a person or group in
Nightspots (Chicago GLBT Nightlife News) and Windy City Times
(a Chicago Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender News and Feature
Publication) does not indicate the sexual orientation of such
individuals or groups. While we encourage readers to support the
advertisers who make this newspaper possible, Nightspots (Chicago
GLBT Nightlife News) and Windy City Times (a Chicago Gay, Lesbian
News and Feature Publication) cannot accept responsibility for
any advertising claims or promotions.








About WCMG      Contact Us      Online Front  Page      Windy City  Times      Nightspots      OUT! Guide     
Identity      BLACKlines      En La Vida      Archives      Advanced Search     
Windy City Queercast      Queercast Archives     
Press  Releases      Join WCMG  Email List      Email Blast      Blogs     
Upcoming Events      Todays Events      Ongoing Events      Bar Guide      Community Groups      In Memoriam      Outguide Categories      Outguide Advertisers      Search Outguide      Travel      Dining Out      Privacy Policy     

Windy City Media Group publishes Windy City Times,
The Bi-Weekly Voice of the Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Trans Community.
5315 N. Clark St. #192, Chicago, IL 60640-2113 • PH (773) 871-7610 • FAX (773) 871-7609.