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  NIGHTSPOTS

Peeks and Tweaks
Rants Raves and Everything in Between
by Andrew Davis
2003-08-13

This article shared 1331 times since Wed Aug 13, 2003
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1. The vest boy: Rapper 50 Cent has given his six-year-old son a tailor-made bulletproof vest. We've gone from Baby Gap to Baby Gat.

2. Lou Ferrigno: When asked how the new computer-generated Hulk compared with his original one, the actor said that 'the real person is more human.' Ladies and gentlemen, Dr. Lou Ferrigno!!!

3. Lording it over: The Lord of the Rings is being made into a musical. As long as Harvey Fierstein doesn't want to be a hobbit, it should do OK.

4. Jail bait: Accused murderer Scott Petersen is getting love letters while in jail … for those who love them tall, dark, and homicidal.

5. Lil Kim: In her song 'The Jump Off,' she brags how she can make a Sprite can disappear in her mouth. Big deal. I can make a six-pack of Bud Light disappear in mine.

6. David Beckham: The soccer player's medical physical was broadcast on Spanish TV … re-defining Must-See-TV.

7. Madonna: She's in an ad for The Gap. I just can't wait for Jennifer Lopez to see the softer side of Sears.

8. Ashton Kutcher: He's being paid $6 million for the 2004-05 season of That 70's Show. Somehow, I feel like I've been punk'd.

9. 'Boy Meets Boy': This Bravo reality show features a gay man who may end up choosing a straight man as a mate. I'll watch this show as soon as they have drag kings on 'The Bachelor.'

10. African keen: You just know that, before his trip to Africa, President Bush thought that Senegal was a laxative.

11. John Leguizamo: He played a boxer in HBO's Undefeated. He hadn't looked so good since To Wong Foo.

12. Sinead O'Connor: She's officially retired from singing. Both of her fans are said to be highly upset.

13. Redux: There were 11 big-screen movie sequels out this summer. Everything new is old again.

14. Paul Reubens: Celebrities are still defending the man who would be Pee Wee Herman by claiming his art is eccentric, not pornographic. I hope that doesn't include the movies Rear Factor and Grinding Nemo.

15. Vanna White: She wrote a letter to a cat that watches her on television. I think the letter was 'X.'

16. What's up with gay men who try to hook up with straight ones? Trying to be accepted where you're not wanted … is that what being a Log Cabin Republican is like?

17. Ancient: Old Roman cosmetics were found at a site in London. They came from Maximus Factor.

18. Sad, but true: The average chocolate bar has eight insect legs in it. I just hope those lumps are almonds.

19. Michael Jackson: He got into a fistfight with a woman—and, boy, can that Bea Arthur kick some ass.

I'm at westelm406@yahoo.com .


This article shared 1331 times since Wed Aug 13, 2003
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