Retro Mercury has been tracking mud on your carpet for the past month but this week the old marauder changes direction. Not a moment too soon. Now you can mean what you say and say what you mean. Hmm, just what do you mean by that??
ARIES ( MARCH 21 - APRIL 20 ) Proud Rams can finally let loose and fully enjoy themselves now that the chains of responsibility are hacked off. Make a bold statement. Ask and you shall receive. But be careful of what you demand - you may just get it. And then what?
TAURUS ( APRIL 21 - MAY 21 ) Retro Mercury may have rained on your pride parade as the rainy storm clouds of family nonsense dampened your spirit. Queer Bulls must be themselves. Rule one: Always pack an umbrella... and a pair of rubbers.
GEMINI ( MAY 22 - JUNE 21 ) Pink Twins seem to know what to say to bring heated situations from a rapid boil to a slow simmer. Turn on the charm! But if you simply can't say anything nice, give 'em a big smile and dump weeds in their yard when they're not looking.
CANCER ( JUNE 22 - JULY 23 ) Begin to reassess and reinvest what's left of your investments. Seek the right financial advisor and ask the right questions. Keep your eye on the bottom line, gay Crab. The next financial bath you take will be with champagne instead of boiling oil.
LEO ( JULY 24 - AUG. 23 ) Your desire to please may have inadvertently trod on a few toes. Breathe a sigh of relief, proud Lion; you can now charm the pants off just about anybody and should quickly make up for lost time. Plot your future position. Is it prone??
VIRGO ( AUG. 24 - SEPT. 23 ) The light is on in your closet and you have no impediments to cleaning it out and dumping the contents in the trash. Queer Virgins should travel and seek exotic stimuli. Just how exotic is up to you. Will it involve a tub of margarine and a roll of foil?
LIBRA ( SEPT. 24 - OCT. 23 ) Have you alienated any compadres over the past few weeks? Don't wait. Make up for lost time and a few misunderstandings with a few gay get togethers. Bosom buddies will be closer to you more than ever. How about a group grope... err hug?
SCORPIO ( OCT. 24 - NOV. 22 ) It is time to repair your corporate ladder? With the right meetings and careful conversations to the powerful few, queer Scorps can recoup their losses and receive a helping hand. At this point you'll need to use every finger.
SAGITTARIUS ( NOV. 23 - DEC. 22 ) Legal processes may have had their snafus. This week gay Archers can rest their case and show their briefs. But don't rest on anything else; Travel first class. Either that or take a trip to the corner honky tonk for some wilde honky tonkying.
CAPRICORN ( DEC. 23 - JAN. 20 ) Pink Caps find more interesting and sexy possibilities as the week progresses. Look sharp, lover. You pull into overdrive, seek more pop-ups and have quite a bit more zip in your corruptible hard drive. Just steer clear of any spam or viruses.
AQUARIUS ( JAN. 21 - FEB. 19 ) Aqueerians might have run their dearest and queerest relationships over hot coals while Mercury retrograded. You begin to yearn for permanence and balance. Don't spend time dreaming of what might be. Get off your duff and start cooking.
PISCES ( FEB. 20 - MARCH 20 ) Guppies seem to have improved their negotiation skills as well their ability to better organize their thoughts and projects. Maybe it's time to ask for that overdue raise. If they refuse, you can always parlay your skills in the pond up the street.
( c ) 2005 MADAM LICHTENSTEIN, LLC., All Rights Reserved. For Entertainment Purposes Only.
Cruise www.TheStarryEye.com for prescient horoscopes and insightful articles. Lichtenstein's highly acclaimed book 'HerScopes; A Guide To Astrology For Lesbians' is celebrating its 5th birthday and 4th printing this year! Buy it and get the scoop on each sign.
