Great breakthroughs often occur through serendipity. But when Uranus retrograded for the past six months, the risks were greater than the rewards. Reap those languishing rewards as Uranus redirects now. Who knows what new surprises are in store. Hey, want to supersize it?
ARIES How often in the past months have you found yourself yearning to be somewhere else rather than with the usual gang of idiots? Gay Rams now find the spark of genius in their current circles. Just how much voltage do you need for your monster?
TAURUS Queer Bull might have tripped up professionally during retro Uranus. It is time to brush off your tap shoes and try, try again. Even though things are still fairly unpredictable, the buffalo chips will at least fall around you rather than on you.
GEMINI Uranus redirects and pink Twins find a plethora of pleasant surprises through travel. Is there something more for you out there? Absolutely! Continue to postpone lawsuits however; Uranus raises quite a few objections if you try to rest your case.
CANCER Impetuous Uranus calls to you in a sweetly seductive voice but resist. Sexual liaisons during this Uranus transit can bring madness-prone pink Crabs to the brink of insanity. Don't lose your head for just another pretty face. Did I say head? I meant mind.
LEO Do you make petty demands as a test of leverage in a relationship? Proud Lions risk tipping over the scales for something less than monumental. Uranus may redirect but that just means that the falling anvil misses your tail. It will still fall if pushed.
VIRGO Call a moratorium on dieting. Resistance is futile anyway; Uranus redirects and tosses unexpected, delectable morsels your way. Queer Virgos are usually paragons of strength but Uranus reduces you to mush ... topped with whipped cream.
LIBRA Whatever your level of talent, the redirection of Uranus demands that you attend to it with relish. A little hot sauce couldn't hurt either, queer Libra, as romantic possibilities seep out of every platonic opportunity. Don't forget the lobster bib, lover ... .
SCORPIO How many times will you rearrange the furniture, proud Scorp? The temptation is to keep moving things around until they form a sensible, stable composition. But that ain't gonna happen now. Resign yourself to constant change for the time being.
SAGITTARIUS Charming you are not especially when Uranus retrograded. Now your words are as incendiary as usual but with more beneficially impactful results. Thinking of nailing your personal manifesto to the wall? Don't hit your thumb, gay Archer.
CAPRICORN Gay Caps can be thrifty. Let's face it, they can be cheap. But your safety net looks moth eaten since retro Uranus pillaged your bank account. Uranus redirects but does not halt your reckless spending. Hold on tight. The next months will be thrilling.
AQUARIUS Aqueerians usually make unusual first impressions and decide to revamp their look on a whim. Normally that would mean a new haircut or wardrobe but Uranus pours on the greasepaint and the feathers now. Be proud as a peacock, pal. Nice tail.
PISCES Clean out your closet before wilde Uranus does it for you. While Guppies prefer to hide behind their comfortable fig leaf, the planets strip them naked and every pimple is magnified and paraded before the judges. Are you a 2, a 10 or a ruler, cousin?
© 2003 MADAM LICHTENSTEIN, LLC., All Rights Reserved. For Entertainment Purposes Only. Cruise www.TheStarryEye.com for prescient horoscopes. Madam is the author of 'HerScopes; A Guide To Astrology For Lesbians' from Simon & Schuster.