The temperature is rising as Sun and Mercury square Neptune and Mars in May. Let's check the rear-view mirror before we exceed the speed limit. Our desires can lead us to wasteful, slothful, mis-directed action. Hmmm, going my way cousin?
ARIES Gay Rams go off half cocked in their wilde pursuit of happiness. Merry May has you overspending and racing around with the wrong crowd. Eventually you find that words do not suffice. Use your mouth for more productive pursuits and don't breathe a word ... .
TAURUS If you find that your best-laid professional plans lay an egg, cut yourself some slack. Don't start new projects this month. Neptune, the planet of delusions has you building corporate castles in the sky. Anyone home, queer Bull? Guess not.
GEMINI Pink Twins have static on the psychic line and imagine all sorts of pleasant but bizarre scenarios. Some more fanciful excursions become detours. Stay in the right lane while May races along. By the summer you can accelerate beyond your speed limit.
CANCER Hot pink Crabs get their claws caught in the nookie jar as the difference between friends and lovers blurs. Neptune fogs your common sense and Mars goads you to action. Will they give you cabfare in the morning? Will you last until the morning?
LEO Late nights at the office has your significant other significantly miffed. Or do you even notice proud Lion? Neptune dreams on and generates magnificent 'what ifs' to your 'so whats?' Eat dinner at home unless you want to tuck into frozen just desserts.
VIRGO You are tied to your desk this May. Queer Virgins are reduced to sunning by their desk lamps and sticking their toes in sandy kitty litter as they dream of South Beach. Expect a small bit of respite. Why not take an entire hour for lunch for a change!
LIBRA Gay Libras go off on wild tangents that can get you into all sorts of hot water (think hot tubs ... ). But all play and no work leaves you a dissipated old thing at the end of the month. Keep that youthful glow by looking before you leap. Splat!
SCORPIO Neptune and Mars have a way of upsetting the applecart of domestic bliss. Queer Scorps can't quite seem to achieve balance and get pulled in two directions at once (is this your thing??). Will you be able to get out from under. Do you really want to??
SAGITTARIUS Gay Archers say something to throw things offtrack and toss their credibility into question. This is especially troublesome at work where your careful efforts become confounded. So what else is new? Piece of advice—Key West is lovely this time of year.
CAPRICORN Practical pink Caps usually have a close handle on their funds but May tosses your hard-earned bucks into the blender. Planets whip you into a frenzy of fun, frolic and frittering as you fork it over. Will you get what you pay for? Do you care? Yippee!
AQUARIUS There is more than enough wilde activity this May to keep Aqueerians fully entertained. Acquaintances make themselves at home in your home in every imaginable way. Relatives are added to the mix for flavor. I just love a parade. Don't you?
PISCES Is May one of those months where you talk to yourself more often? The urge to make an impact on the world is too tempting to resist. But resist you must, Guppie. May will be the month to recharge, relax and reduce the stress. Meditate or medicate???