Venus moves into Gemini and 'squares' wilde, unpredictable Uranus. Our best-laid plans could turn out to be wet dreams. Buck up compadres; this too shall pass. Don't forget to change the sheets.
ARIES Rambunctious gay Rams enjoy a few bolts out of the blue when retro Uranus squares charming Venus. If you find yourself in a philosophical conversation with imaginary elves, count your blessings. They don't kiss and tell. Trolls on the other hand ... .
TAURUS Generous queer Bulls may enjoy showering their pals with lots and lots of cash, but don't expect any payback. Wastefulness is not one of your better attributes; you work too hard and long to toss it away. It's always better to be well endowed, I say.
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GEMINI Try though you may, the upper crust is decidedly unimpressed with your stale schtick. If your first impressions are off the mark with the power brokers, I suggest that you give it a rest until next week. You'll wow the pants off of them then.
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CANCER Even perceptive proud Crabs get static on the psychic line when retro Uranus squares Venus. Hold your cards close to the vest for the time being. It makes no sense to broadcast your best-kept secrets when the crowd is more interested in you-know-who.
LEO Gay Lions may be faced with a trade off between friends and lovers when volatile Uranus squares flirty Venus. If you can't please everybody, I suggest that you at least try to please yourself ... several times.
VIRGO Are you attending a corporate meeting or your partner's cousin's graduation? Retro Uranus square Venus blurs the line between what is expected of you in career and relationships. Save decisions until next week, queer Virgin; this week you are bound to screw up.
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LIBRA Rainbow Libras have wanderlust but also have the moral conscience to realize that there will still be loads of work to be done when they return. It's difficult to think globally when your ass is in the trenches. Haul it home and do the deed, pardner.
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SCORPIO Retro Uranus squares Venus as delicious opportunities call out to you like a mesmerizing refrain. But will gay Scorps waste their riches? Choose wisely; behind door #1 is a bathtub of champagne. Behind door #2 is Rick Santorum in a peekaboo teddy.
SAGITTARIUS I smell turmoil brewing between partners and family. Wise gay Archers know when to do nothing while warring factions snap at each other. Why stick your tail out when nobody will notice? Your tail is too lovely to squoosh.
CAPRICORN Pink Caps have strong opinions but must you say it now? at work? If you don't have anything nice to say, button the lip and quietly mull it over instead. Things are still evolving. Wait until next week when you can blast 'em between the eyes.
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AQUARIUS Cheap and tawdry fun is more expensive than expected. Aqueerians will wince when the bill for those jolly times comes due. Do you really want to save for a rainy day? Take a skinny dip while the water is warm.
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PISCES Guppies believe they can behave one way around friends and another around relatives. You shouldn't act at all unless you act up. Why not take a leading role in being your true lavender you around friends, family and, dare I suggest, around everyone.
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