Amy Matheny's spirituality column appears monthly in Identity.
This contributing columnist is near and dear to my heart. It's my dad. My father, raised Southern Baptist and now United Methodist, has always been a man full of faith and spirit. Seven years ago, I challenged him and his faith and since that day we have been on an extraordinary journey.
When I came out to my parents, my mom handled it much better than I expected. She was gentle and kind and constant. My father had a tough time. I could see the hurt wash over him with my words and see the pain in his eyes. But I also could see his love for me. He was so conflicted. I am a 'Daddy's girl.' And for him to love me so much and yet have this thing, my sexuality, hurt and scare him so deeply. But it is that unconditional love of a parent, that 'agape' love that Christ asks us to have, that challenged my dad that even over 60 years old, God had more for him to learn. And he has listened and learned.
In Leo Matheny's Words:
The Holiday Season is near at hand and many of us are making plans to be with our families. It seems this time of year draws us closer to one another. Makes us realize how important family is, or should be, to us all.
As far back as I can remember Christmas was not only a time of gift giving but also a time for sharing with a loving family. Today, that tradition still exists, even though my parents have been gone for a long time and I am no longer the child.
Nothing is more important than my family and coming together at this time of year. We share our love with one another and then our kids are gone again. One of the sad things in life a parent has to realize is that, once your child leaves home, they only come back for short periods of time. As a family, we need to make the most of those brief visits.
I remember well, one Christmas, when Amy decided to 'come out' to my wife and me. When the tears started ( from us all ) , we felt closer to her than ever before. Though at first her sexuality was something I didn't understand and felt was wrong based on my religious and social upbringing, my love for her challenged me to confront my beliefs and look again at the Word of God. And if you know Amy, you can imagine she was persistent in my coming to terms with who she was. And through that journey and through the Word of God, I found acceptance and celebration of her sexuality. Now, Amy's friends, who are gay, lesbian and transgender, have become our friends and in some cases we even feel like surrogate parents to some. We feel that the homosexual community has accepted us.
But there are those who find coming home other than wonderful. Some have little to return to, and back home, the love and care that should exist, may not be there. Home should be where love abounds for each other.
However, there is one parent we can always come back to—our loving Heavenly Father. The Bible tells us that 'nothing can ever separate us from the love of God.' ( Romans 8:35-39 ) How can it be that an 'awesome' God knows me by name and loves me without reservation? It is because He created me. He made me who I am and He knows my every thought and deed. When you 'came out' He was there to love and accept you as He made you. Like my wife and I for Amy, he probably cried and loved you more than before.
At Christmas time some of us celebrate the birth of a child, a very special child. One who would someday grow into manhood and be revealed and accepted by many as the 'Son of God'. Someone who was truly 'Love in Action'. He brought a message of peace and good will to all men and women. He showed us all how to love our neighbor. Yet He held no public office, had no money, not even a home in which to live. But by His words and examples, showed the world how to love one another. When asked what is the greatest commandment, He said, 'to love the Lord God with all your heart, mind and soul and the second is likened unto it—to love your neighbor as yourself.' ( Matthew 23:34-40 ) All the rest of the commandments are embodied in these two. Think about it.
I once saw a sign that said, 'I know I am somebody, because God don't make no junk'.
We need to value our life because it is a gift from God. And live our life with the pride of knowing that no matter what anyone else says—we are children of God. The Bible also says, 'if the Lord be with us, who can stand against us.' ( Romans 8:31 ) This Holiday season, hold your head high with pride—knowing that God knows your name and you always have a parent in His home.