Windy City Media Group Frontpage News

THE VOICE OF CHICAGO'S GAY, LESBIAN, BI, TRANS AND QUEER COMMUNITY SINCE 1985

home search facebook twitter join
Gay News Sponsor Windy City Times 2023-12-13
DOWNLOAD ISSUE
Donate

Sponsor
Sponsor
Sponsor

  WINDY CITY TIMES

MOMBIAN Prop 8: A spoonful of sugar
by Dana Rudolph
2009-06-17

This article shared 2389 times since Wed Jun 17, 2009
facebook twitter google +1 reddit email


We've been on a Disney movie kick around our house, spurred on by a recent visit to the Magic Kingdom. As fate would have it, the day the Prop 8 decision was announced, we had chosen to watch Mary Poppins. I was looking forward to some Julie Andrews, but didn't expect to be discussing civil rights in the process.

Those of you familiar with the film will recall that Mary Poppins' employer, Mrs. Banks, makes her first entrance after participating in a suffrage rally. She explains that one of her fellow protesters was taken away "clapped in irons."

Our son was puzzled by this, as he only understands such punishments to be for "bad guys." We explained that people sometimes do things to draw attention to their cause and change matters for the better.

As I write this, police have arrested over 100 protesters in San Francisco, and SFGate.com says officers were "moving methodically from person to person to first clap plastic ties on their wrists and lead them away to a police van."

We've moved from iron to plastic, but much remains the same.

Trying to explain women's suffrage to our son makes me wonder how LGBT parents in California are explaining the current happenings to their children. Same-sex couples in California are raising more than 70,000 children, according to UCLA's Williams Institute. How will they tell their kids that it is possible for citizens to vote away the civil rights of another group of citizens? More to the point, how will they do so and yet instill a belief in American democracy?

Even more perplexing for children will be the decision to uphold the marriages of same-sex couples performed between May and November of 2008. I am glad for the couples whose marriages remain legal, but I wonder: How will Johnny's moms explain to him that Charlie's dads down the street are married because they were smart enough to seize a window of opportunity, but that his moms are not because they were waiting for a reservation at the wedding location of their dreams, or they were too busy caring for an ailing relative last year, or they just didn't believe the voters would take away this right?

Here's another puzzler: LGBT parents and allies will want to explain to their children that the lack of married parents is no reflection on the children's self worth. It's a message LGBT parents everywhere have long tried to express, before we ever had the right to marry in any location. As we tell our children this, however, are we not also conveying that marriage is not strictly necessary for a happy and committed family, even if it does bring certain rights and benefits that we would like?

Our children's view of marriage as the fundamental institution of society will thus be shaken, Disney movies of Cinderella notwithstanding. By not letting same-sex couples into the institution of marriage, the right wing has therefore done more to undermine it than any loving same-sex couple.

Maybe marriage isn't necessary in the long term, and we should open up benefits and responsibilities to couples in various types of relationships ( e.g., two straight single moms or two elderly sisters who rely on each other for assistance ) , as some have suggested. That remains an open possibility.

For the moment, however, marriage is still the lingua franca of committed adult relationships. It brings many hidden benefits, above and beyond civil unions and domestic partnerships. As civil-union commissions in New Jersey and Vermont have shown, separate is not really equal. Many children of same-sex parents do struggle to maintain confidence in the face of harassment about their families.

Mary Poppins, however, gives me hope, not only because Julie Andrews always makes me smile, but also because it reminds me how far we've come in the overall struggle for human equality. I do believe in Martin Luther King, Jr.'s bendable arc of the universe. For every Plessy v. Ferguson there will be a Brown v. Board of Education. Already, two same-sex couples have filed a lawsuit in a U.S. District Court arguing that Prop 8 violates the U.S. constitutional guarantee of equal protection and due process. The AP reports that one of the lawyers in the case believes it could end up before the U.S. Supreme Court.

"Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious," perhaps the most well-known song from Mary Poppins, contains the line, "One night I said it to me girl/And now me girl's my wife!" One might hope the word's magical powers were true. We could utter it and find ourselves in a land where any two people could marry.

Alas, it's going to take a lot of work. The show's song, "Sister Suffragette" is really more appropriate: "No more the meek and mild subservients we!/We're fighting for our rights, militantly!/Never you fear!/So, cast off the shackles of yesterday!/Shoulder to shoulder into the fray!/Our daughters' daughters will adore us/And they'll sign in grateful chorus/'Well done! Well done!'"

That sense of hope, of leaving a positive legacy for our children and grandchildren, is the spoonful of sugar that will make the hard work of equality go down.

Dana Rudolph is the founder and publisher of Mombian ( www.mombian.com ) , a blog and resource directory for LGBT parents.


This article shared 2389 times since Wed Jun 17, 2009
facebook twitter google +1 reddit email

Out and Aging
Presented By

  ARTICLES YOU MIGHT LIKE

Gay News

Thailand parliament passes landmark marriage bill 2024-03-27
- On March 27, Thailand's parliament approved a marriage-equality bill by an overwhelmingly large margin—a landmark step that moves one of Asia's most liberal countries closer to legalizing same-sex unions, media ...


Gay News

NATIONAL Va. marriage bill, AARP, online counseling, Idaho items, late activist 2024-03-21
- Republican Virginia Gov. Glenn Youngkin signed bills protecting same-sex marriages at a state level, surprising some, WRIC reported. The bills—passed out of both chambers along mostly party lines—will require clerks ...


Gay News

Greek legislature approves marriage equality 2024-02-15
- Greece has become the 36th country, and the first Christian Orthodox-majority one, to legalize same-sex marriage. The BBC reported that same-sex couples will now also be legally allowed to adopt children after the 176-76 vote that ...


Gay News

Tenn. legislators back bill that lets officials refuse to perform same-sex weddings 2024-02-15
- Defying a national ruling that authorized marriage equality, Tennessee lawmakers approved a measure that would allow public officials to refuse to perform weddings of same-sex couples, The Hill reported. Tennessee's House Bill 878/Senate Bill 596 says ...


Gay News

WORLD Marriage in Greece, UK politics, cruise death, HRC grants 2024-02-02
- The Holy Synod of the Church of Greece unanimously agreed at a recent meeting that it is "strongly opposed" to the Greek government's promised bill on same-sex marriage and adoption, Balkan Insight reported. The conservative New ...


Gay News

NATIONAL Marriage news, fighting fentanyl, anti-LGBTQ+ crimes, Grindr 2024-02-02
- The Virginia House of Delegates passed a bill that would affirm marriage equality in the state, The Washington Blade noted. House Bill 174, introduced by state Del. Rozia Henson (D-Prince William County), passed in the Democratic-controlled ...


Gay News

WORLD Activist honored, marriages in Estonia, Madrid law, trans sports item 2024-01-05
Video below - The National AIDS Commission (NAC) recently honored Caleb Orozco—a leading figure in the fight for LGBTQ+ rights in Belize—for his instrumental contributions to the national HIV response, BNN reported. According ...


Gay News

Catholic Church allows priests to bless same-sex couples but reaffirms disapproval of gay marriage 2023-12-22
- LGBTQ+ couples can now receive blessings from priests, but the Catholic Church maintained its strict ban on gay marriage, according to a Vatican document approved by Pope Francis Dec. 18. This historic change in doctrine marks ...


Gay News

Greek government vows to back marriage equality 2023-12-22
- Despite opposition from the Church of Greece and within the ruling New Democracy, Greek Prime Minister Kyriakos Mitsotakis' government said it will eventually move to legalize same-sex marriage, The National Herald reported. However, no timetable was ...


Gay News

Dignity/Chicago welcomes new rule on church blessings for same-sex marriages 2023-12-18
--From a press release - Dignity/Chicago, the advocacy organization for LGBTQI Catholics and friends, welcomed the news that the Vatican's doctrinal office has officially declared it possible for Catholic priests to bless same-sex unions and ...


Gay News

New Ways Ministry: Pope's blessings approval is Christmas gift to LGBTQ+ Catholics 2023-12-18
--From a press release - MOUNT RAINIER, Maryland—Statement by Francis DeBernardo, Executive Director, New Ways Ministry: Pope Francis gave LGBTQ+ Catholics an early Christmas gift this year by approving blessings for same-gender couples. The Vatican ...


Gay News

Pope Francis changes policy, allowing priests to bless same-sex unions; GLAAD responds 2023-12-18
--From a press release - GLAAD: "By removing barriers to priests blessing LGBTQ couples, the Pope accurately recognizes that LGBTQ people and our relationships are worthy of the same affirmation and support in the Church, and this strengthens couples in their ...


Gay News

LGBTQ+ couple the first in South Asia to have marriage recognized 2023-11-30
- Transgender woman Maya Gurung and Surendra Pandey became the first LGBTQ+ couple to have their marriage legally recognized in South Asia after they received a legal certificate in Nepal's Lamjung district on Nov. 29, The Guardian ...


Gay News

WORLD Thai marriage law, French bill, Miss Universe, IKEA, activist dies 2023-11-24
- Thailand Prime Minister Srettha Thavisin said that the cabinet approved a draft law on marriage equality and that it would be brought to parliament during a session starting in December, Reuters reported. If the draft law ...


Gay News

Pope: Trans people can be baptized and act as godparents 2023-11-09
- Pope Francis has stated that trans people may be baptized and act as godparents or witnesses to marriage under the same conditions as any other adult—as long as a scandal does not result, according to PinkNews. ...


 


Copyright © 2024 Windy City Media Group. All rights reserved.
Reprint by permission only. PDFs for back issues are downloadable from
our online archives.

Return postage must accompany all manuscripts, drawings, and
photographs submitted if they are to be returned, and no
responsibility may be assumed for unsolicited materials.

All rights to letters, art and photos sent to Nightspots
(Chicago GLBT Nightlife News) and Windy City Times (a Chicago
Gay and Lesbian News and Feature Publication) will be treated
as unconditionally assigned for publication purposes and as such,
subject to editing and comment. The opinions expressed by the
columnists, cartoonists, letter writers, and commentators are
their own and do not necessarily reflect the position of Nightspots
(Chicago GLBT Nightlife News) and Windy City Times (a Chicago Gay,
Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender News and Feature Publication).

The appearance of a name, image or photo of a person or group in
Nightspots (Chicago GLBT Nightlife News) and Windy City Times
(a Chicago Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender News and Feature
Publication) does not indicate the sexual orientation of such
individuals or groups. While we encourage readers to support the
advertisers who make this newspaper possible, Nightspots (Chicago
GLBT Nightlife News) and Windy City Times (a Chicago Gay, Lesbian
News and Feature Publication) cannot accept responsibility for
any advertising claims or promotions.

 
 

TRENDINGBREAKINGPHOTOS







Sponsor


 



Donate


About WCMG      Contact Us      Online Front  Page      Windy City  Times      Nightspots
Identity      BLACKlines      En La Vida      Archives      Advanced Search     
Windy City Queercast      Queercast Archives     
Press  Releases      Join WCMG  Email List      Email Blast      Blogs     
Upcoming Events      Todays Events      Ongoing Events      Bar Guide      Community Groups      In Memoriam     
Privacy Policy     

Windy City Media Group publishes Windy City Times,
The Bi-Weekly Voice of the Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Trans Community.
5315 N. Clark St. #192, Chicago, IL 60640-2113 • PH (773) 871-7610 • FAX (773) 871-7609.