Jo Giarrante has not had a typical experience as a lesbian in the healthcare system.
In 2007, Giarrante developed severe sarcoidosis—a disease that causes inflammatory cells to form on multiple organs. At age 59, Giarrante looks back on her life, her spirituality and the reason she is still alive today.
Giarrante was a nun for 20 years before discovering she is a lesbian. She left the church to start dating.
After coming out, Giarrante knew she could no longer be part of her church despite her continued investment in living a spiritual life. She began a career in spirituality, first through the Institute for Spiritual Leadership in Hyde Park and, eventually, in her own practice.
The work, Giarrante said, "encompasses everything from teaching to having a private practice, and what I call companioning on a spiritual journey—I'm actually the spiritual director. And I also have groups for women and I do training with people."
Shortly after beginning in her work in spirituality, Giarrante met her partner, Janet Trazska.
Trazska stood by Giarrante's side in 2007 as they learned that Giarrante had sarcoidosis.
Giarrante was forced to leave the Institute for Spiritual Leadership to search for the right heart for a transplant.
"My condition was actually so bad that I had to be bedridden until the heart came or I received another procedure to keep my heart pumping," Giarrante, said.
"I had 10 days," she continued. "If I didn't get a heart in 10 days I was going to need that pump. So I waited, and it was actually okay. I know that sounds strange but I just really trusted I was going to get one, and I really didn't question that; I don't know why. I guess I just really had reason to believe it would happen. ... The hard part was thinking that for in order for me to live, somebody had to die."
Giarrante's friends believe God must have something intended for her since she was given a second chance at living.
"But, I have to be honest, I don't really know," Giarrante said. "What I do know is that there are three things that are really important to me: that I have fun in my life, that I love as well as I can love, and third that I know that my life is short, and I need to live every day."
Since Giarrante's transplant, she has opened a private practice for spiritual learning from her house. She is also chairman of the Patient Family Advisory Board at Northwestern Memorial Hospital. For her, serving on the board is a way to give back.
In contrast to the all-too-familiar story about LGBT people being excluded from their partners' healthcare, Northwestern accommodated Trazska and Giarrante.
"Janet was part of my journey—never restricted from any part of knowing what was going on or visiting rights," said Giarrante. "Northwestern was wonderful. They talked with Janet, had conversations with her. They were totally respectful of us as partners."
Giarrante's insurance was not as welcoming—at least, in the beginning. "The insurance company only wanted to pay part of the bill, which was close to one million dollars at that point," she said. "Janet had to write a letter because she's a grant writer. ... She made a case and eventually they ended up paying the full amount. After that, we had no problems."
The couple is grateful they now receive healthcare coverage though Trazska's work at DePaul. Giarrante knows many LGBT seniors who do not have such benefits. She has a friend suffering from cancer who will not be able to access her partner's benefits.
From her experiences, Giarrante wants people to gain perspective.
"I want people to let the small and big things roll off their backs," she said. "You've got to be grateful for what you have and hold on to it. We make such mountains out of small things—I know I did. And now I'm like, 'oh, that's nothing.' Just let it go."
