Ask various people about actor/comedian Carlos Menciawho's probably best known for his Comedy Central show Mind of Mencia, which ran 2005-08and you'll probably get a laundry list of adjectives.
One of those descriptors, however, would have to include "honest." In a very candid interview with Windy City Times, Mencia talked about weight loss, "Octomom"and he feels why Tracy Morgan should not have apologized for anti-gay remarks he made last year.
Windy City Times: I've seen these photos of your weight loss. You look like Kate Moss now.
Carlos Mencia: You know what's funny? When I used to hang out with my gay friends before, they would [ask], "When are you performing? When are you going to be in town?" Now, they're like, "Let's go have a drink. You're looking good!" That was the first time I felt like I was different. There are no people pickier than gay men. [Laughs] I was, like, "Really? I look good enough for you to ask out?" But overweight people are mad at me.
WCT: What?
CM: Yeah. Before, I was the overweight dude who never talked about it so it wasn't an issueso they were, like, "If it's not an issue for him, it's not an issue for us." As soon as I lost weight, they thought I was telling them, in a way, "You're not healthy." They didn't take it the way I thought they would; they take it personally.
WCT: I was looking at your bio and saw that you're the 17th of 18 children. So "Octomom" must be no big deal to your family.
CM: When Octomom was getting all that attention, my mom was so pissed. She said, "Why are they making a big deal? She had them all at once. I popped you all out." My mom has no multiple kidsso she was like, "Where's my TV show?" I said, "Mom, you were born at the wrong time." She could've had a show called 18 and Growing or something like that.
You know what's funny? I didn't realize how much things affected me. For example, when I'm in a house with only two or three people, I feel so lonely. I'm used to kids running around everywhere. But I do have 76 nieces and nephews.
WCT: You don't buy gifts for all of them?
CM: God, noI'm Jewish, bro. That's not even a joke. It's once a year. We're just talking immediate family.
WCT: You sound like you'd go into bankruptcy.
CM: Listen to meand I mean this. If it wasn't for how big my family is, I'd be a millionaire. Right now, I'm a hundred thousandaire because of them; I kid you not. I love my family; I just don't like them. At our last family reunion I said, "I love you allbut if you weren't family, I would choose never to hang out with you. [Both laugh.]
WCT: I saw [your 2003 special] Not for the Easily Offended. I have to say, being Black and gay, it definitely opened my eyes because you spare no one. However, I found myself cracking up a lot and surprising myself.
CM: Why?
WCT: Well, there's the titleand people are sensitive about things.
CM: It depends on how it's put out there. I think the biggest problem today is that people can be offended by a joke. A joke, in its purest form, is intended to make someone laugh. There's a difference between a joke and something that's demeaning. People can say things to be mean and hurtful. What we do on stage is all intended to be funny; none of it is intended to hurt.
I'm the kind of comic who will ask, "Are there any gay people in the audience?" They'll say, "Yay," and I'll say, "OK. Let's talk about them." That's the opposite of most comics. Most of them will say, "Any Jewish people here? No? Let's talk about them." For me, if people are not at my show, then it's like I'm talking shit. I actually want to celebrate diversity, you know what I mean?
WCT: I thought it was interesting when you said [in "Easily Offended"], "If you can take a dick, you can take a joke"although my response would've been, "Unless your dick is a joke."
CM: [Laughs loudly] That was cool! I'm going to use that. From now on, that's going in the act. That was a great quote.
But we should all be that way. You can find a joke unfunny, and you can even say it goes too far for your sensibilities. But at the end of day, I never got a bad blow job. It's like, "I appreciate what you do there." I think a joke should be taken in a very similar fashion. "Thanks for trying."
I think comedians are being taken way too seriously today.
WCT: So do you think Tracy Morgan should have gone on that apology tour [after that anti-gay joke last year]?
CM: No. I think what Tracy Morgan should've done was say, "I'm sorry if I hurt anyone's feelings. That was not my intent." I don't think he should've apologized for the joke because, in apologizing, he said it's wrong to make jokes about gays. He also was saying it was wrong to say [derogatory terms] on stage. That's bullshit. Everything is appropriateand in the proper context, it's even funny. He fucked up by doing that. I will never apologize for the actual joke.
It was the same way with Jo Koy [who apologized after using "faggot" at a Chicago show last year]. They're making it real. Stop apologizing! It's like when people say to me, "I disagreed with what you said on stage." Why are you agreeing or disagreeing? It's either funny or not funny.
In a way, it's like when the gay community gets on the cases of twinks, saying they're too femme, too this, too that. Who gives a fuck? He's being who he wants to be. There's no right way to be gay. If he wants to wear wings and a tutu and walk down Santa Monica Boulevard, who cares? It doesn't mean that all gays are like that.
I don't represent anyone but myself. C'mon, guystake it easy! On one hand, we act like we're monolithic, but then we say everyone's different. Just pick one, people. I just think [comedy's] being dissected way too much.
WCT: You've kinda answered this question, but I'm going to rephrase it: What actually offends you? Is it closed-mindedness?
CM: Yes. What offends me is people's inability to have common sense. Common sense, to me, is so lost. I have gay jokes in my act, but why do we care about what's gay, who's gay? We all knew someone growing up who was gay. We may not have known at the time what it was exactlybut we knew they were [different]. I don't know why that common sense is being lostand not just with gays. It applies to everything. That's why I don't get people who take comedy seriouslyit's a glorified knock-knock joke.
A friend of mine bought me a big clown tieabout three feet long. The other day I told a joke and the audience went "Ooo." I said, "I'll be right back," went to the green room, got the big tie, put it on and started telling jokes again. Every time they starting going "Ooo," I'd take the clown tie and say "I'm sorry. I'm just telling a joke." Little by little, they stopped "ooo"-ing, and got over it. It was awesome.
WCT: But you had to train the audience?
CM: Well, I'm different; my act is about the world as it is and world as it should be. I tell the audienceand I believe thisthat a big part of the angst today comes from the world that should be. People believe that the world as it should be is actually the way it is.
No kid should be ridiculed; in the real world, it's gonna happen. In my opinion, I think every gay kid should be called a "faggot" in an angry way by some bigoted piece of shit. I don't think they should be called that because I want to hurt their feelings. I think they should grow tough skins and realize that there are shitty people who bully other people. People need to own who they are.
WCT: How do gay people react when you say that?
CM: Gay people applaud. They say, "He's right. People already look at us differently." People are saying, "You're like me; you shouldn't get married." Gay people have to deal with [some people viewing them differently]. If I had a gay son or daughter, that's the first thing I'd tell him or her: "People are going to fuck with you. That's a fact. Get used to that shit. Just be youdon't worry about that shit." Maybe if people had thicker skin, they wouldn't kill themselves.
By the way, it's interesting how things have changed because of the Internet. Before the Internet, the bullies were the jocks in school. Today, the biggest bullies are the nerds who go online and say the meanest, cruelest shit through the anonymity of the Internet. So the bullied have power and, just like others, are abusing that power.
WCT: How do you think your comedy has evolved?
CM: I let go of my anger.
As a kid, I didn't want to be a gangbanger or drug dealer, and I didn't want to be in jail. I got to an age when I realized, "I'm not that guy." I knew who I wasn'tbut who am I? I didn't have an answer. In finding that answer, I was able to let go of anger [about past incidents]. I grew up in a school where somebody would say "I want to be president," and the teacher would say "I'm sorry. There'll never be a Mexican president." Now, I touch on subjects others may not to open minds.
I now choose to go to a more positive place. At the end of the day, I'm a lucky immigrant born in Honduras who lives in the United States and who has a God-given talent that lets me provide for my family. If I were in Honduras, I'd be the funniest dude milking a cow.
Carlos Mencia will be at the Chicago Improv in Schaumburg June 7-9. See www.CarlosMencia.com for more information.