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  NIGHTSPOTS

G-Spot
by graysong
2004-11-24

This article shared 3434 times since Wed Nov 24, 2004
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Context. It's all about context. I've been doing g-spot panels for Nightspots off and on for over 2 years now. There have been a number ideas that have never been tackled because they worked better as illustrations than as stand-alone 'toons. Now we bring you the new g-spot, an amalgam of words and images. OK, so it's really just a page for me to do whatever-the-hell I want, but don't complain about it, just lie back and take it--kind of like a Log Cabin Republican.

Do you believe in miracles?

My friend Fred once informed me, "I won't believe in miracles until I see John Coltrane's face in a pizza." The conversation happened a few years ago, when whispers of the Nun Bun, a cinnamon bun that looked like Mother Teresa, were circulating. His words came back to me this week amidst the hubbub over the Virgin Mary Grilled Cheese Sandwich that was recently up for auction on eBay.

If you haven't been following the "news," here's a synopsis. 52 year-old Diana Duyser put a grilled cheese sandwich up for auction that she claims has the face of the Virgin Mary scorched into the bread. The image, as my beau David pointed out, actually looks "more like a Grease 2-era Michelle Pfeiffer—you know, before the nose job."

Duyser made the sandwich 10 years ago with plain white bread and American cheese and claims it has never sprouted a single spot of mold. Of course, considering that the sandwich was probably made on Wonder Bread using Kraft Singles, this qualifies more as a fact of life than an actual bona fide miracle.

The auction started drawing attention and had registered over 100,000 hits when eBay yanked it, citing a policy against joke postings. That's when the story exploded. CNN and other media

outlets picked up on it. eBay,

probably realizing that the auction would drive traffic to the site, reinstated it. Bids on the sandwich soon reached the eBay maximum—over $99M. As this is written, the auction is still ongoing, so the saga of the Virgin Mary Grilled Cheese is unfinished, but it should be resolved by the time this column is in your hot little hands.

From these things sprang this g-spot, Miracles. There were a number of miracles that were rejected for the final spot in the panel. Mary Kate & Ashley's faces in a pile of coke ( or vomit ) was dated; Britney Spears' face on a pop tart was a recycled joke; and Jesse Jackson's face in a skid mark, although funny, was too close to reality to be miraculous. In then end, I opted for Fred's Coltrane. It has a little class. Fred, now you can believe.

Send praise and offers of financial gain to gspot@graysong.com


This article shared 3434 times since Wed Nov 24, 2004
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