with Pubert and Dicksel
'Porn Experts' Pubert and Dicksel promise to be punctual, picky, and probing with all their reviews. Thumbs up the butt ( good review ) or finger down the throat ( gag me dude ) - you be the judge. Grab your popcorn, your lube and enjoy the ride!
Chi Chi LaRue's Hardware
Judging a Porn By Its Cover
P: Front cover displays hot men in leather pants.
D: I love the tattoos!
P: Back cover showcases a cowboy showing us his backyard.
D: Definitely would buy this from the cover alone.
First scene begins with clients in an office where they go to get their fantasies fulfilled using a Sex O' Tron. Each of the three clients enters a room where the computer creates a scenario for them.
Client #1
P: His name is Mr. Wilson ( played by Johnny Hazzard ) ? He changes from a nerd to a leather boi!
D: He gets to play with leather daddy ( played by Joshua Adams ) . Lick that tattoo!
P & D: Ewww!
D: He just spit in his mouth!
P: And now he is spitting on his leather pants. Spit n' shine!
D: Is this what safe sex has come to? Sex through leather pants!
P: Wait, the pants are coming off now. The pink rubber is so manly.
D: Mr. Wilson is getting plowed by Dennis the Menace!
P: He is jabbing his balls with his penis. What do you call that? The Ball Buster?!?
D: No, it is called the Head in the Sack!
Client #2
P: This customer's ( played by Chad Thomas ) dream is to be behind bars as an inmate.
D: He looks like Willy Wonka and here comes the Chocolate Factory!
P: In walks cell guard ( played by Randy Gunz ) . That is some dark dick!
D: Is that Martha Stewart's old cell? Nice lime green quilt.
Client #3
P: This guy ( Theo Blake ) has a fantasy to be a cowboy. Must be a Mexican ranch. Love the Latin cowboy played by Daniel Duarte.
D: It's Bo and Luke Duke on a haystack!
P: Straw on the dick, not tasty for a blowjob. The blonde actor is missing part of his ear—gross. Piercing it really keeps the attention away... ha ha.
D: Maybe he had an accident in the General Lee.
P: The last scene is the nasty secretary from the office using the Sex O' Tron computer to whip up a three way. So what did you think, Dicksel?
D: I liked the music, it was a little Knots Landing theme song in some places, though.
P: The camera angles are great!
D: Yeah, they know how to shoot from far away to see everything.
P: I hate to see all close-ups; gimme the full fantasy. This was a first rate production.
D: Yeah, they had me from cover to cover.
To order this go the web site www.Channel1Releasing .com
Pubert: Thumb up the Butt
Dicksel: Thumb up the butt
Heated About Hardware? E-mail Pubert@windycitymediagroup.com and we can discuss!
