Openly lesbian state Rep. Deb Mell married longtime partner Christin Baker Aug. 24 in a judge-officiated ceremony in Davenport, Iowa. Mell is the first high-profile Illinois official to enter into a same-sex marriage.
"It was important to have the marriage certificate and say that we've been married," Mell, 43, said. "We've been through a lot, and we've been together a long time. Our union deserves the title of marriage… I don't see civil unions as being equal."
NOTE Please see related story and photos, Deborah Mell and Christin Baker wed, published 2011-09-10, at the link www.windycitymediagroup.com/gay/lesbian/news/ARTICLE.php?AID=33707
Illinois began issuing civil unions June 1, but still doesn't offer same-sex marriage; Iowa is one of just six states that does.
Mell and Baker enlisted good friends Jim Bennett—Lambda Legal's Midwest regional director—and state Rep. Kelly Cassidy to act as witnesses.
"We thought, if you have to do a road trip in a day, who would we have the most fun with?" said Baker, 36, national director of arts and humanities at the YMCA. "You don't want to have to schlep your whole family three hours for a five-minute ceremony, and three hours back. Jim and Kelly were totally game, and we just had an absolute blast."
On Sept. 8, the pair will say their vows once more—this time in front of family and friends at their North Side church. While both women wore black fitted suits in Iowa, Baker said she'd switch things up at the church ceremony and wear an off-white suit she had made on a trip with her mother. A Sept. 10 reception will follow.
Although they've only been married two weeks, both women say their relationship has already changed for the better.
"It feels totally different!" Mell said. "It's weird. I can't really explain it because we've been together seven years. … One of [ Baker's ] cousins emailed me and said, 'Welcome to the family!' I was like, 'I thought I was part of the family.' But in a lot of straight people's eyes, you're not really part of the family until you're married. … She's my wife, and I think that's a heartier term."
Mell has been a vocal proponent of civil unions and marriage equality since joining the state legislature in 2009. Many credit her impassioned 2010 plea on the state House floor ( during which she announced her engagement to Baker ) as a turning point in passing Illinois civil-union legislation.
"I don't think that if we didn't have a lesbian woman stand and tell her story that there would've been the response that came," Rick Garcia told Windy City Times in June.
The couple hopes making their marriage so public will make people more comfortable with the idea of same-sex marriage and show legislators how important full marriage equality is.
"I have hope for marriage in Illinois," Baker said. " [ I ] hope that the governor, just like Cuomo did in New York, would support something like that. He doesn't right now. We deserve marriage, and it should be called marriage."
Up next is a honeymoon in Paris. The newlyweds will rent an apartment in France's capital for an eight-day vacation, their first lengthy non-work-related trip as a couple.
"We just really want to chill out," Mell said with a laugh. "We just want to relax and sit in a café and not move."
