"Believe me, I have no idea why anyone hires me."—Mila Kunis tells GQ magazine. I thought it was just me!
Christmas came a bit early to the Masters home as I just received the final executed forms refinancing my little Fort Lauderdale, Fla., beach house. This has been a long, arduous process. When President Obama announced the Help for Homeowners Act, I immediately applied. That was more than two and a half years ago! After six different applications, daily phone calls, weekly faxes, e-mails to bank executives and threats to bring my story to the media (well, I am the media), it finally happened. I share this story to give you all hope. Like so many things in life, you have to treat it like a game ... and when it comes to winning at a game, I'm tenacious. Just be patient—it's worth it.
Last week, I zipped to NYC to see some shows and catch up with some friends, starting with a special reading of Matthew Lombardo's "Tea at Five," directed by Rob Ruggiero and starring Charles Busch—three of my favorite people. To make it even better, my date was the dashing attorney-to-the-stars Mark Sendroff. My adoration for Charles is well-documented, but it went up a few notches that night. I'd never seen him play a real person before—at least not for what amounts to an extended monologue. His grasp on Katherine Hepburn's every nuance in various stages of her life is extraordinary. The team worked hard to trim the play down to a tight single act and, judging from the response, it was a hit! Also on hand were folks like the divine Julie Halston and my new best friend, Hunter Ryan Herdlicka, who I almost sent to the emergency room ... but that's another story. Oodles of money were raised for the Ali Forney Center, which is a safe haven for homeless LGBT youths in NYC. Congrats!!!
While I was in NYC, a story was breaking in my own backyard. This concerns Kevin Hogan, who is an English teacher at a Malden, Mass., charter school. He's also head of the English department as well as—I almost hate to say this—the coach of the crew team. So you know what's coming, right? Well, you're wrong. No one got touched in a locker room, but it was discovered that Mr. Hogan also goes by the name Hytch Cawke—a name that really only works if you say it aloud, and even then it's kinda stupid.
Hytch has appeared in three gay pornos: Fetish World 1, Just Gone Gay 8 (are we up to 8 already?) and Ass Fucked by a DILF 2. In case you're wondering, he is one of the DILFs. This story was uncovered by a FOX reporter in Boston named Mike Beaudet. He confronted Kevin/Hytch in one of those ambush-style interviews usually reserved for presidential candidates accused of philandering or corporate heads who spill oil on pelicans! Hogan repeatedly said, "I don't know what you're talking about."
The revelation led the school to place Hogan on paid leave while it investigates. Intriguingly, response to the report has not been particularly favorable. According to the local FOX affiliate, viewer feedback has been split 80/20—with 80 percent AGAINST the station. (There's no differentiation between being against the style of the report or the nature of the story.) Because you know I'm a stickler for research, I tracked down some of Hytch's work. Let me share a detail no one else has brought up—aside from being shaved within an inch of his life, his penis has a Prince Albert piercing. Also, while the movie I watched employed the use of a condom, at a certain point it disappeared! That may have happened when his erection began to subside; if you look inside his partner, it might still be there—or perhaps you'll spy it when you watch the video on BillyMasters.com .
Now, time for more of "Billy's Holiday Gift Giving Suggestions." This week we have a book by one of my favorite people. Porn legend Tom Judson has released Laid Bare—Essays and Observations, which is really a collection of short stories from various times of his life. Some are outrageously funny, some insightful, some tender, some sentimental, but all quite entertaining and written in Tom's unique voice—you'll love it! You can buy it at Amazon.com, and at BillyMasters.com we'll run a video of Judson reading a story aloud.
Let's slip in a quick "Ask Billy" question. Someone on our Fan Forum asked: "What do you know about HSN cutie Brett Chukerman? He looks really familiar, and he's adorable."
Before he was hawking his wares on cable, he was an actor. You likely remember him from Eating Out 2: Sloppy Seconds, where he showed all in a steamy scene with the equally delectable Marco Dapper. He again played gay in The Curiosity of Chance, where he does a striptease! Regarding his personal life, he's quite coy: "I want to be everyone's fantasy, it's part of my job." Fantasize away while you watch every inch of him on BillyMasters.com .
When FOX viewers are on the side of a gay-porn star, it's definitely time for me to end yet another column. The next few weeks will be a whirlwind of travel—miles to go before I sleep. But no matter where I am, you can get the latest gossip at www.BillyMasters.com . My more tawdry tales can be found in Billy's Boudoir, which is getting more popular by the moment. If you have a question that needs my personal attention, dash it off to Billy@BillyMasters.com and I promise to get back to you before we see Tom Judson hawking bee pins on QVC with Joan Rivers! So, until next time, remember, one man's filth is another man's bible.
