"That was the best kiss I have ever had. It was deep, it was intense and it was a long time coming."—Jason Segel talks about the on-screen kiss he shared with Paul Rudd on Saturday Night Live that included, dare I say, licking. Of course, it wasn't his only same-sex kiss. However, it appears to have been his favorite.
Did you have a happy Thanksgiving? I did. Being in Boston always puts me in the holiday spirit. Alas, my trip got off to an unfortunate start after I was forced to see the latest Twilight film with a longtime friend. In truth, we both loathe these films, but we get enormous pleasure out of grumbling about how painful each and every moment is. Also, I suppose I can be thankful that Kellan Lutz's part has been beefed up to match his physique. In the latest flick, he actually has nine—count 'em—nine lines! I know extras who have had more to do in a film. Of course, most of you probably went to ogle the lovely and often-shirtless Taylor Lautner, and you wouldn't be alone. At the L.A. premiere, a male fan was overcome near the end and screeched, "Taylor Lautner, you're a sexy fuck!"—a quote that could show up in an upcoming ad campaign.
My favorite part of the holiday season is "Billy's Holiday Gift Giving Suggestions," where I share some gifts suitable for fans of this column. Kicking off this holiday season, we're recommending two items which can be given together or separately. Back in 2000, Dustin Lance Black got the chance to write and direct his first feature film. The result was The Journey of Jared Price, which is a tantalizing glimpse at the work he'd do later and has the feel of a gay indie after-school special. It also contains more than a bit of nudity, and who'd complain about that? Corey Spears, as Jared, gives a genuine and nuanced performance. More recently, he shared another side of himself in a collection of poetry entitled "P-Town Diaries." This chronicles a summer where Spears loved, lost and lived. While both of these products are lovely on their own, taken as a pair they have even more substance. I'd suggest heading to Amazon.com, where you can not only pick them up, but even watch Jared Price online.
Let's turn our attention to George Michael—who is currently hospitalized in Vienna with what is being called "severe community acquired pneumonia." This begs the question, "Who could George have acquired this from?" Earlier this month he was rumored to be dating both a hairdresser and porn star. First, we got photos of George stepping out with celebrity hairstylist Fadi Fawaz, who was born in Austria, is of Lebanese decent and works in London. These photos were taken in Venice—which makes this a very international item.
Days later, we got snaps of George on the balcony of the Hotel Danieli in Venice with someone who looked like a porn star who appeared in Match Maker for Cazzo Studios in Berlin under the name Isaac Mazar. Since I doubt this is a name that appears on a birth certificate on either side of the Brandenburg Gate, I did a bit more digging and discovered that Fadi Fawaz and Isaac Mazar are one and the same! We don't really know if this is a tryst, a fling or a full-out affaire de coeur, as they'd say in French—a language I'm using solely to show off my multilingual skills. However, I can tell you that Isaac shows off his anal-lingual skills in his porno flick. It's a real penetrating performance, which I'm sure helped seal the deal with Georgie. We'll share the photos and video over at BillyMasters.com .
Let's move along to our "Ask Billy" question, which comes from Randy in Washington, D.C.: "I need you to settle a bet. My friend says Thomas Jane went full-frontal nude on Hung. I'm sure I'd remember that. Who wins?"
If Thomas Jane is naked, we ALL win. Up until recently, the answer would be that you win this bet. But it's entirely possible that your friend is slightly psychic. For the benefit of the readers, this question was sent Oct. 16. On the episode of Hung that aired Oct. 23, we did indeed get a glimpse Thomas Jane's nether regions. In one role-playing scene, he's wearing a jock strap. After he takes it off, the camera pulls back to reveal a good ... oh, I'd say, four inches of a rather plump penis dangling betwixt his legs. From the looks of it, that was only the beginning. See for yourself on BillyMasters.com .
Before we end, let's slip in one more tiny penis ... and, alas, I do mean tiny. Several fans wrote in after my item about that hot guy who wears a lot of mascara from The A-List Dallas posting a nude photo of himself. (I not only can't recall his name, I can't summon up enough interest to look it up.) On The A-List New York, Austin did some test shots for Playgirl and these fans wanted to know when those shots would surface. According to Danny Nardicio at the mag, the photos weren't ever going to be published. "It was a publicity stunt created by [Austin] to try to be the star of the show," said Nardicio. What? You mean something on a reality show was staged? I'm SHOCKED! Danny did paint a visual picture for us: "He was insecure about the small size of his penis, which is why I was so complimentary. I always have to stroke models' egos, but he was understandably embarrassed. Soft, it's tiny. It made me think of the Dolly Parton song 'Little Sparrow'." It could have been worse. It could have reminded him of "Is That All There Is?"
When I'm quoting Peggy Lee songs, it's time for me to end yet another column. But first, let's quickly send out congrats to my buddies Christopher Sieber and Kevin Burrows on their Thanksgiving NYC nuptials. Well done, lads. For all the best stories around, check out www.BillyMasters.com, where you will also find my more personal revelations in Billy's Boudoir. And, like the real-life thing, my online boudoir is open to anyone at any time. If you've got a question, I say just shoot it along to Billy@BillyMasters.com and I promise to get back to you before we find out how hung Thomas Jane really is! Until next time, remember, one man's filth is another man's bible.
