"It's the Mariah Menu. It's not just the Mariah Meal. It's a whole menu."—Mariah Carey explains her deal with McDonald's. Sure, you could say, "I'll have the McMariah—and super-size it." But isn't it easier to simply say, "Gimme one of everything?"
I never miss Hollywood when I'm away, but I'm always happy when I return. I spent the past week in my glamorous Hollywood abode—glamorous, but frigid. The heat appears to be on the fritz, which you'd think is not much of a problem in sunny Southern California. But during winter nights, the temperature drops precipitously—my phone says it "feels like" 43. While I attempt to keep hypothermia at bay, let's warm up with some hot topics.
The jury found Jussie Smollett guilty of five out of six charges. Surprise, surprise. But the dish is in the details. During his time on the stand, Jussie threw numerous people under the bus. He claimed Empire creator Lee Daniels "fat-shamed" him—which is why Jussie hired Abel Osundairo to become his "trainer." Smollett said the relationship with Abel was not romantic, but admitted they got high (cocaine and pot), went to a bathhouse, made out and "masturbated together." I don't believe that's all that happened. If that hot Nigerian trainer was high, naked and aroused, I believe Jussie would have been on that … literally!
Smollett also claimed Don Lemon kept him in the loop regarding the police investigation of the so-called "hate crime." If true, many believe Lemon should face the same punishment Chris Cuomo did for feeding his brother information. Speaking of loops, we saw the "noose" that was around Jussie's neck—correction, which he allegedly took off from around his neck and then put back on when the police arrived. Smollett won't be sentenced until next month, but the presumption is he'll skirt jail time and face a hefty fine and community service. He still has to deal with the civil suit—the City of Chicago wants to be reimbursed for the cost of the investigation.
I think Colton Haynes would make an ideal cast member in the next Magic Mike film. We hear the producers are looking for some new "talent." Given what the last flick did for Bomer, Manganiello, Strahan and Rodriguez, it might not be a bad move. And something tells me Colton could show Mike a thing or two.
Anything can happen on a live program. Last week, "Billy Masters LIVE" faced numerous challenges as we began chatting with famed designer Bob Mackie. When the computer froze, we frantically posted "Stand By—Technical Difficulties," as a backup computer was used. The show may have lacked technical finesse, but the marvelous Mackie delivered delicious dish about people like Mitzi, Cher, Bette, Carol, Babs, Whoopi, Oprah and Ross! Frank Vlastnik, author of the book The Art of Bob Mackie, contributed to what turned out to be a great show. Check it out at BillyMasters.com/TV or YouTube.com/BillyMastersTV.
On this week's show, we start with author Jim Colucci, who collaborated with the legendary Norman Lear for All in the Family: The Show that Changed Television. This is a gorgeously illustrated and painstakingly researched book that would make a great gift for any TV lover. We finish with singer/actor Rex Smith. You can tune in live Thursday, Dec. 16, at 3 p.m. ET / noon PT—or anytime thereafter.
Now it's on to this week's installment of "Billy's Holiday Gift Giving Suggestions." Obviously, you should pick up the All in the Family book. But what about some music? Would you believe Leslie Jordan and Cheyenne Jackson have released a Christmas ditty? The Call Me Kat co-stars recorded "The Little Drummer Boy"—which seems completely appropriate. Actually, they're doing the "Little Drummer Boy (Peace On Earth)" version performed by David Bowie and Bing Crosby for a 1977 holiday special. Hearing Cheyenne and Leslie intone "Come, they told me" seems more an order than a suggestion.
This leads to our brief "Ask Billy" question. Jordan in Chicago says, "Did you see the photos of Luke Evans from Miami last week? He looks sexier than ever. Who was the hot guy with him?"
I saw, I came, I replied—in that order. The photos of Luke in a sleek and skimpy Speedo were enough to heat my nether regions. As to the other guy, I doubt he's anyone of significance. Most romantic partners would kiss Luke on both cheeks. If he kissed all four, I'd think otherwise. Until I get further photographic evidence, you can check out every inch of Luke on BillyMasters.com .
When Evans is helping me avoid frostbite, it's definitely time to end yet another column. As we went to press, our friend Christopher Rice informed us of the passing of his mother, Anne Rice. I was reminded of what a strong ally she was to the LGBTQ+ community. Rest in peace. Of course, those of you not resting should check out BillyMasters.com—the site that'll get your blood pumping. If you think you've got what it takes to warm the cockles of my … well, my cockles, drop a note to Billy@BillyMasters.com, and I promise to get back to you before Jussie makes some new friends in the pokey—so to speak. So, until next time, remember: One man's filth is another man's bible.
