Windy City Media Group Frontpage News

THE VOICE OF CHICAGO'S GAY, LESBIAN, BI, TRANS AND QUEER COMMUNITY SINCE 1985

home search facebook twitter join
Gay News Sponsor Windy City Times 2021-09-01
DOWNLOAD ISSUE
Donate

Sponsor
Sponsor

  WINDY CITY TIMES

Billy Masters
by Billy Masters
2020-01-08

This article shared 2626 times since Wed Jan 8, 2020
facebook twitter pin it google +1 reddit email


"This is 20/20."—Cheri Oteri rang in the new year as Barbara Walters alongside a stoic Andy Cohen and a giggling Anderson Cooper on CNN.

I'm a lot like Tina Turner. Now, the obvious question to ask is, "How, Billy, are you like Tina Turner?" Sometimes I like my life to be nice and easy; but sometimes, I like it to be nice and rough. I was thinking—what would be a good challenge for this, the dawn of a new decade. Then it hit me—we've got 50 states in this country ( more or less ), and we've got 50 weeks in a year ( more or less ). So, why not try and have sex with a guy from a different state each week. I've built in a lot of conditions for this challenge. First off, none of this has to be done alphabetically. Also, layover sex in an airport definitely counts. However, the guy and I don't need to have sex in the state in question. But since I'm a stickler for details, IDs should be consulted—even at certain gatherings where clothing is not required. Come to think of it, on a good night I could cross like a baker's dozen states off the list if I'm lucid enough to keep track. Let's see how this goes—and how often I need to go to urgent care!

Kathy Griffin didn't need a gig on New Year's Eve to make headlines. Forget about CNN and ABC. Kathy had a captive audience watching her ring in the New Year from her palatial home, where she GOT MARRIED! Yes, Griffin married her on-again/off-again bea, Randy Bick. To make it a truly gayla affair, the officiant was the legendary Lily Tomlin, while Tomlin's spouse, the great Jane Wagner, was a witness. It's not God, but it's close.

I wonder if Russell Tovey and Steve Brockman will become the Colton Haynes and Jeff Leatham of 2020. ( There's a chance many of you reading this would not be able to identify any of those four people in a police lineup. ) Tovey and Brockman were dating in 2017. They got engaged in 2018. Later that year, they broke up ( perhaps coinciding with news of Brockman's gay porn past going public ). Last year, they started dating again. And as the year drew to a close, they were once again engaged. Looking forward to more drama with those crazy kids in 2020.

Gus Kenworthy has no use for kids. He's courting an older crowd. How much older? In the words of Mame Dennis, somewhere between 40 and death. Gus was videotaped meeting a group of three gay men who are denizens of God's waiting room, Palm Springs. ( Fort Lauderdale is God's parking lot. ) When shown a photo, the men seemed unsure who Gus was. One said, "Who was that Olympic skier? Adam Rippon's friend. Chuck Helmsworthy?" In the words of Jesus' parents—Oy! Once Gus was correctly identified, he came out to meet the oldsters, who were quite smitten—after all, Kenworthy is both dashing and delightful. Well, that and as one guy kept pointing out, he's got those thighs and that ass. Check out this fun video on BillyMasters.com .

One of the people who made our list of scandals of 2019 was Kevin Spacey—by way of that busboy ( and, yes, I am well aware that he was not underage for the sexually activities Spacey was after; but he was underage for those drinks that Spacey bought ). That busboy got off easy—so to speak. Two of Spacey's other targets had very different outcomes. One was a masseur in Malibu, and the other was married to the princess of Norway. You know what happened to them when they attempted to bring Spacey down? They ended up dead! The masseur sued Spacey for grabbing his genitals ( in my massages, it's usually the other way around ). When the case was cleared for trial, the masseur petitioned the court for anonymity, stating that he "has concern for their safety and/or do not want their names revealed publicly in the media." Days later ... DEAD. As for Ari Behn, the 47-year-old former prince, he died by suicide. Then again, 2019 was a tough year for princes.

As 2019 drew to a close, we lost a giant among men: the legendary composer Jerry Herman. It's interesting to note that 2019 began with the death of Herman's dear friend and muse, Carol Channing. I don't think Jerry would want us to remember him by mourning. He'd want us to celebrate life ... something he did in all of his musicals. And the fact that he was diagnosed as HIV-positive in 1985 and lived 34 years proves something. So long, dearie.

Our first "Ask Billy" question of the year isn't particularly gay, but it amuses me. Frank in Detroit asks, "Have you seen the Mad About You reboot? I love it— but where is Fran?"

I love it, too. The chemistry between Paul Reiser and Helen Hunt is perfect, as is the writing. ( I could do without so much daughter, but that's me. ) A hallmark of the original sitcom was the quirky supporting characters. I'm glad to see Ira, Lisa and Mark back. As for Fran, actress Leila Kenzle ( who played the role ) gave up acting a few years ago and is now a psychotherapist. The irony is Fran's onscreen husband, Mark, is now married to Tonya, who is—you guessed it—a therapist! If the studio just matched Leila's hourly rate, they could probably get her to do a cameo.

When someone charging an hourly rate is NOT the subject of a blind item, it's definitely time to end yet another column. Speaking of Mad About You, where is Ursula? Why not have Lisa Kudrow drop in occasionally? Or have her work at Mark's restaurant? Why am I wasting these ideas on you? While I get my agent on the phone, let me remind you to get the latest gossip ( and casting ideas ) atBillyMasters.com—the site that has nothing against you doing it on the couch. If you have a question for me—or if you're an Alaskan visiting Los Angeles for the weekend—send an email to Billy@BillyMasters.com and I'll get back to you once I'm south of the Mason-Dixon Line. Until next time, remember: One man's filth is another man's bible.


This article shared 2626 times since Wed Jan 8, 2020
facebook twitter pin it google +1 reddit email





Windy City Media Group does not approve or necessarily agree with the views posted below.
Please do not post letters to the editor here. Please also be civil in your dialogue.
If you need to be mean, just know that the longer you stay on this page, the more you help us.


  ARTICLES YOU MIGHT LIKE

Gay News

Billy Masters on RuPaul and more
2021-09-20
"The reason I said no wasn't because I wasn't proud of who I was, or I didn't want to represent the LGBTQ+ community in any way. It was because Raven Baxter is Raven Baxter is Raven Baxter. And Raven Baxter is ...


Gay News

Billy Masters
2021-09-13
"If you want the most dramatic season ever, do an LGBT version. I think maybe it's the time for The Bachelor to do a gay Bachelor."—Lance Bass pitches his idea to ABC. You may recall that ...


Gay News

Billy Masters
2021-09-06
"I'm so happy to know I have a fan in Maine!"—Joan Rivers in a letter to yours truly sometime in the mid-80s. Massachusetts had just begun using the MA abbreviation instead of Mass! She may have ...


Gay News

NATIONAL Calif. bill, lawsuits, Billy Porter, 'Southern LGBTQ Experiences'
2021-09-05
The California legislature okayed a bill that would launch a pilot program to better track the gender identity and sexual orientation of victims of fatal violence, Gay City News noted. Under AB 1094, or the Sexual ...


Gay News

Billy Masters
2021-08-30
"I wasn't looking forward to this conversation. But you and your questions and your reintroduction to some of my past enlightened me [and] inspirited me, and I eagerly took the bait."—Ed Asner on Billy Masters LIVE. ...


Gay News

SHOWBIZ Billy Porter, 'Death Drop,' Brandi Carlile, vintage films, Gaga
2021-08-29
Billy Porter will direct a queer teen comedy feature titled To Be Real for Amazon Studios, which is being helmed by Gabrielle Union's I'll Have Another Productions, NME.com noted. Porter, who is currently working on his ...


Gay News

Billy Masters
2021-08-23
"When I heard it was going to be done again, it was supposed to be Will Smith and Beyonce, I thought, that's interesting. … I thought that was a great idea. So, I was surprised when I saw how alike it ...


Gay News

Billy Masters
2021-08-16
"It's wonderful so many have supported Britney! I've just heard the news! Wonderful things can happen when we stand together … but not too close because I have just learned that some of you do not ...


Gay News

Billy Masters
2021-08-09
"Did you see my Apple interview (with Zane Lowe)? I think I look damn good. I could still play Mama Rose."—Barbra Streisand in an interview to promote her new CD, Release Me 2. It sounds like ...


Gay News

Billy Masters
2021-08-02
"If you are fortunate enough to be in a relationship with a supportive family, in a country or place where living openly is pretty safe, I really would recommend it because it will only benefit you ...


Gay News

Billy Masters
2021-07-26
"I'd still be full of jokes and fun, but no more naked pranks. I can see now my actions were pretty juvenile but this was a different time and it's something I would not do today."—John Barrowman told The Daily Mail ...


Gay News

Billy Masters
2021-07-19
"No excuses—I messed up. I'm a big sports fan. I'm like the guy at the end of the game who misses a free throw or a kick."—Spike Lee explains why he prematurely announced the winner of ...


Gay News

Billy Masters: Judy Gold, Provincetown and more
2021-07-12
"I don't know. I just … I think I'd be good at it."—The fabulous Jennifer Coolidge explained why she would like to come back as a gay man. If reincarnation exists, I'd like to come back ...


Gay News

Billy Masters
2021-07-05
"like the song is literally about gay sex what y'all want me to do play the piano while baking a cake?"—Lil Nas X tweets a response to criticism of kissing one of his male dancers on the BET Awards. Call me ...


Gay News

Billy Masters
2021-06-28
"Ballet dancers and hairdressers and drag queens made it safe for football players to come out and not the other way around."—Dan Savage puts Carl Nassib's coming out into the context of those who came before ...


 



Copyright © 2021 Windy City Media Group. All rights reserved.
Reprint by permission only. PDFs for back issues are downloadable from
our online archives. Single copies of back issues in print form are
available for $4 per issue, older than one month for $6 if available,
by check to the mailing address listed below.

Return postage must accompany all manuscripts, drawings, and
photographs submitted if they are to be returned, and no
responsibility may be assumed for unsolicited materials.
All rights to letters, art and photos sent to Nightspots
(Chicago GLBT Nightlife News) and Windy City Times (a Chicago
Gay and Lesbian News and Feature Publication) will be treated
as unconditionally assigned for publication purposes and as such,
subject to editing and comment. The opinions expressed by the
columnists, cartoonists, letter writers, and commentators are
their own and do not necessarily reflect the position of Nightspots
(Chicago GLBT Nightlife News) and Windy City Times (a Chicago Gay,
Lesbian, Bisexual and Transegender News and Feature Publication).

The appearance of a name, image or photo of a person or group in
Nightspots (Chicago GLBT Nightlife News) and Windy City Times
(a Chicago Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender News and Feature
Publication) does not indicate the sexual orientation of such
individuals or groups. While we encourage readers to support the
advertisers who make this newspaper possible, Nightspots (Chicago
GLBT Nightlife News) and Windy City Times (a Chicago Gay, Lesbian
News and Feature Publication) cannot accept responsibility for
any advertising claims or promotions.

 

 

 

TRENDINGBREAKINGPHOTOS







Sponsor
Sponsor


 



Donate


About WCMG      Contact Us      Online Front  Page      Windy City  Times      Nightspots      OUT! Guide     
Identity      BLACKlines      En La Vida      Archives      Advanced Search     
Windy City Queercast      Queercast Archives     
Press  Releases      Join WCMG  Email List      Email Blast      Blogs     
Upcoming Events      Todays Events      Ongoing Events      Bar Guide      Community Groups      In Memoriam      Outguide Categories      Outguide Advertisers      Search Outguide      Travel      Dining Out      Privacy Policy     

Windy City Media Group publishes Windy City Times,
The Bi-Weekly Voice of the Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Trans Community.
5315 N. Clark St. #192, Chicago, IL 60640-2113 • PH (773) 871-7610 • FAX (773) 871-7609.