||BEING CONTINUED: KO'd
by AK Miller
This article shared 1227 times since Wed Mar 14, 2012
Just when you think that you've lived through the worst pain you could possibly feel, love comes up with a new punch. You learn to dodge most, but every now and then it lands one square in your jaw. Or sometimes you get struck with a sucker punch to the gut that takes your breath away. You can dance around these brutal attacks, which is exhausting, or you can just learn to take a fucking hit. Another option is to stay out of the ring altogether. But where's the sport in that? If you get knocked down, despite what people have been telling you all of your life, you don't have to get back up; you can stay down. You can lay there beaten and broken until you have the strength to actually stand up on your own and remain standing. That is what Brandon is doing now. Lying in his bed wishing the bruises on his heart would heal before his brain started poking at them. He's fine through most of the night most of the time, but at some point or another he rolls over. That's when he often realizes that he is in bed alone. He isn't conscious enough to brace himself for this one, and it's a smack in the face that wakes him with a sting. It's the surprise attacks that get you and no one seems to warn you about them when a relationship ends. When he is awake and rational, this sort of thing wouldn't bother him at all. It's been over a year and he has moved on to bigger and better things. That's when love knows to pull these sneaky maneuvers. Ones that leave you feeling helpless and sad when moments before you were lost in a dream. Brandon isn't sure why this keeps happening, though, thankfully, with decreasing frequency. He thinks it may be a reminder of the love he felt for someone before he gets over the loss of it completely. Maybe it's a sign that he is healing but just isn't quite healed yet. Instead of getting up and shaking it off, he just lays there trying to make sense of it. Waiting and hoping for the day that a nightmare is no longer the part of bedtime when he is awake. He knows it has to come soon. It just doesn't seem right that he still feels so bad what the other pillow doesn't smell like anyone anymore. He holds that pillow like a shield and plays dead until he slowly falls back to sleep.
This article shared 1227 times since Wed Mar 14, 2012
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