Are you down with O and P? Porn critics Randy Pubert and Olympia Du-cock-kiss give perspectives from the gay and lesbian point of view that could make a steel magnolia blush. Grab your popcorn, your dildo and enjoy the ride!
Judging a Porn By Its Cover
Olympia: This cover makes me want to rip this open immediately!
Pubert: This movie is shot in black and white.
Our Afterschool Special begins just like the ones from the '80s, with girls in school uniforms at a local dinner. A group of tough girls arrives to teach them a lesson.
O: Cute dyke! Are those IB pants?
P: This is turning into an orgy.
O: It's a chemical reaction. This got hot fast!
P: Well, they certainly don't waste any time.
O: Lots of schoolgirl play. They're having fun with it.
P: The girls are squealing so much that I have to turn it down or the neighbors will complain.
O: This makes you want to have sex with more than one person at a time.
P: Well, it is the summer of love, baby, and school is out.
O: This is like a pit crew at a Nascar race; everyone is working as a team.
P: That one needs a tune up. I think her tires just flew off! Rev it!
O: Someone is gunning her engine and about to peel out.
P: This scene ends with a car crash.
With this movie, we also get an additional movie called Turn Me Up, Over and On. This one begins with a girl waiting for lady to come home from work.
O: Score! Cute woman, yay! We have the butch/fem dynamic.
P: Yeah, her husband, I mean, her girlfriend just got home.
O: I like the boy underwear and the tie.
P: What is that?
O: It's a dental dam for rimming.
P: I learn something new from you everyday. What would I do without you, Olympia?
O: Be sexually confused, I guess.
Later that evening…
O: This is how workaholics get started. They just keep going and going like the Energizer Bunny.
P: And still going... one month later, still going...
O: This is a good one.
P: She has unshaven armpits.
O: I used to think that was gross but not now! Hot butches are a plus.
P: There's a fun vibe to this video that I like. Some amateur acting but the girls are really into it.
O: I really like the pasty twirling in the credits.
P: This company has done a lot for lesbian porn because it is made by lesbians for lesbians. I hope women continue to support them by buying and renting their products.
O: I will borrow someone else's thumb to go up the butt.
Pubert: Thumbs up the butt
Olympia: Thumbs up my butt
To purchase these videos separately go to www.fatalemedia.com
Are you P.O.-ed about something? E-mail Pubert at firstname.lastname@example.org